by Latoya Irving
In my previous article we discussed the order of the house regarding God, spouse and children. Now let’s look at the roles of the husband and wife so we can understand why spouse comes before children. This is a spiritual look, not to be confused with the physical everyday needs of spouse and kids.
This may be a controversial topic, as it was hard for me; I had to ask God for some clarification. I even tried to reason how this couldn’t be right, but if it’s in the Bible, the Father must have wanted us to follow it. I consulted Ephesians 5:22-33. Please read it before, while or immediately after reading this article.
Ladies, in verse 22 the Word says we have to submit (offer ourselves) to our husbands as to the Lord. The husband is the head of the wife; I don’t believe it means we are as children to them. Again, this is a spiritual thing. Our responsibility is to respect (value) our husbands. We have to learn to acknowledge their role in the marriage and home. We won’t always agree on their choices, but we have a secret weapon called prayer. Pray that they make wise decisions and hear from God.
Guys, you are to love your wives as Christ loved the church. Christ gave himself for the church. So husbands you are spiritual leaders in the home. Husbands, you are to love your wives like you love yourself. You are to nourish (encourage) and cherish (treasure) your bride. Husbands, if you mistreat your wife, you mistreat yourself. She is a gift from God. The Bible says in Proverbs 18:22 He who finds a wife finds a good thing, and obtains favor from the Lord. If you feel you need to mistreat your wife, or that she is an object for your amusement, I suggest you study the 5th chapter of Ephesians. You are spiritually responsible for us. The word says in verses 26 and 27:
that He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word, 27 that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish.
Verse 32 goes on to say the man and his wife will be joined together and become ONE flesh. That’s why spiritually our kids come after our spouse. The last verse reiterates that husbands are to love their wives as they love themselves and wives are to respect their husbands.
Finally, I pray the roles you play in your marriage will receive a spiritual Oscar from God. If you feel your performance is lacking, study your script (The Word of God).
LaToya Irving is a wife, mother and former Air Force brat.