by Eric Payne
Since entering adulthood I’ve found myself being nostalgic at the end of every year. I contemplate what I’ve done, what I didn’t do and what I possibly could’ve done more. Since getting married this year-end self-analysis has only intensified.
I think back to the time when I loved irresponsibly. By irresponsible I don’t mean promiscuous. I mean loving for the sake of loving, casting off (some) care of the inevitable scary unknown of tomorrow, being silly, holding hands, kissing ferociously and itching, literally itching to see the one you love.
For those who are single or without kids there are less “excuses” not to love at full strength. For us in the married lane the very products of our love for one another often become the reasons we don’t have time and/energy to give each other our best 100 percent.
Make A Plan & Stick To It
Besides self-analysis how do you find out how you’re doing in the love department? The easiest and probably least obvious way is to sit down with your spouse and have a conversation. Give each other and open and objective love check-up. Pledge to agree to disagree before you begin to avoid turning what is intended to be a positive conversation into a catastrophe. Should you choose to do so, you can turn your conversation into a plan of action or a road map for romance for you and your spouse for 2011. It can be as simple as going to church together or having a mandatory monthly date night. You’ll never know until you sit down with one another to try.
Pledge to do your best to love irresponsibly — love in spite of what isn’t right with your life or whatever your circumstances may be, remember your vows, remember the good times, rededicate yourself to them and do your part to do like that old Keith Sweat song says, “Make it last forever.”
Peace and blessings to each of you. Enter 2011 on the good foot. Be happy. Be well. Be love.
Happy New Year.
BMWK family what are your plans/intentions for the New Year with your spouse?
Author of the now infamous, My Wife Is NOT My Friend (on Facebook), Eric talks about being a father and a husband on his blog, Makes Me Wanna Holler ““ Man, Dad, Husband. You can follow him on Twitter or find him chopping it up on his Facebook Page. He is the author of I See Through Eyes, a book of poetry and short stories. In his “spare time” Eric reviews autos and writes relationship articles for Atlanta-based J’Adore Magazine.