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Money Monday: Do Financial Red Flags During Courtship Predict Money Problems Later In Marriage?

by Dr. Charles Alonzo Peters

According to a recent Match.com poll, 50% of women say it would be okay for their date to pay with a coupon.   I consider myself somewhat financially literate, but I still would never in a million years whip out a coupon on a date. But hey, that’s just me.

I have to ask you ladies,   if your husband pulled out a coupon on your first date, would you still have married him?  Many sisters would view using a coupon as a savvy financial move, a hint that their man was knowledgeable about money.

Others, I’m sure, would consider it a cheapskate play. A man who valued their company so little as not to feel the need to pay the full “retail” price for the experience, might not get a second chance.

Now, I know on first glance this may sound like a silly question – should you use coupons on a date? – but it’s just one of many subtle signals that we all give off while courting the objects of our affection. And perhaps it’s these signals that could predict future financial bliss or disaster in marriage.

They say financial problems are one of the leading causes of divorce. Surely, we can learn about marital money matters from dating behavior.   But how many of us could have seen the tea leaves of financial incompatibility before jumping the broom? And even if we did see the warning signs, would we have taken heed in the midst of love in bloom?

It’s easy to overlook statements made jokingly like “Mastercard is hunting me down,” “Sallie Mae is my slave master,” or “You’re my sugar daddy,” when two people are misty-eyed in love.

Yet, who hasn’t ignored a boyfriend’s or girlfriend’s pile of unopened bills on the kitchen table, or the fact that they’re driving a late model Lexus but always complaining about having no money.

In the midst of relationship bliss, mundane details such as financial compatibility get shoved to the side.   A new Zendough.com survey discovered that, before tying the knot, one out of four people avoided conversations about finances completely. Only 24% of couples had a significant discussion about finances, and drew up a family budget before walking down the aisle.

When wedding bells can be heard in the near distance, financial red flags are often ignored completely.

Do you think money behaviors exhibited during dating predict financial problems or success later on in marriage?   What are some of the red flags that past dating partners gave off, warning you they may not be good marriage material?

And, would you be offended if your spouse or boyfriend (girlfriend) pulled out a coupon on a date?

Every Monday you can find great insight and tips on managing your greenbacks by Dr. Charles Alonzo Peters of  MochaMoney.com here on BlackandMarriedWithKids.com.

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