The definition of PROTECT is: to cover or shield from exposure, injury, damage, or destruction. So many times as men we are told that our role is to protect our wives and family by any means. Although we may think that this duty comes naturally because of our testosterone or alpha male status, the truth is that many of us have confused protecting with how “hard” or tough we can be. I think that in the midst of being tough we forget that protection can come in many forms. Here are 3 things you may not be protecting your wife from and you don’t even know it!
1) Your family, especially your Mother
The truth is that sometimes Mother-In-Laws and Daughter-in-laws are in a subconscious battle. Mom is battling for her son and the wife is battling for her husband. Mom thinks that the wife will never add up to her (cooking, parenting, planning…) and the wife feels like she always has to prove something to Mom. These situations can become toxic and sometimes mom can become really disrespectful towards the wife. This is where you must throw yourself into an uncomfortable situation. No son really wants to ever have to “check” his mother, but the truth is that the minute you became a husband you signed up to protect your wife from any disrespect and that even includes disrespect from your own family. You don’t have to be disrespectful or reckless when protecting her, but your wife wants to know that she is the priority and you will uphold and protect her physical and emotional well being. Now if your wife is wrong you must make that clear as well, but the mamas boy tendencies have to go out the window!
2) Your children
In many families you see children who will run all over mom, but they are scared as heck of Dad. They will say disrespectful things, catch attitudes, and show no appreciation. This is where you come in! You must protect your wife from any disrespect from your children. The same way you wouldn’t allow someone on the streets to speak to her disrespectfully should be upheld in your household! Your children should know “this is my wife and if you disrespect her then you are going to have to answer to me!” The best example a father can set for his children is how he treats their mother and in how he allows his wife to be treated.
3) Herself
Sometimes your wife will be her own worst enemy. She will criticize her appearance, her cooking, how she is pleasing you, and other things. This is where you come in! She may not say it verbally, but sometimes she just needs you to reaffirm her and tell her how great of a wife, mother and woman she is. You need to love her unconditionally and this will inevitably help you protect her from herself because she will feel safe and secure within the relationship and with who she is and what she brings to your family and the world.
Sometimes protecting your woman isn’t defined by how many people you can beat up, scare, or intimidate! Sometimes protecting her comes in the form of making her feel secure in the fact that you have her back over anyone else’s and that you love her with all you have!
BMWK – Get involved in the conversation: What do you think men should do to protect their wives?
“Striving to be better than good enough!”