Is he the one? Is she the one? As singles, we’re used to asking these questions over and over whenever we date someone. We’re hearing and seeking people’s advice and guidance regarding dating and relationships and often times, we look to family or our closest friends for their thoughts and trusted approval of the person we’re dating. But, how do you know what God has to say about the person you’re dating?
In This Article:
- When God Tells You He’s Not for You
- God Protects Your Heart
- Don’t Settle Just Because You’re Feeling Left Out
- Being at the Same Level of Intimacy with Him
- Learn to Discern
- Be Mindful of Wannabe Relationships
- God Is Preparing You for True Love
- Always Pray and Pursue God
Is He the One? How Do You Know If God Wants You to Be with Someone?
When God Tells You He’s Not for You
One of my sisters in Christ received a word for her life. She got a prophetic word that the guy she was seeing was not the one for her, nor was he even the type of the man she desired deep in her heart. God was reminding her that she was settling. My friend received the word and believes God’s word regarding her life, but she had to make a tough decision– let the guy she’s been talking to consistently know that he’s no longer who she needs to be pursuing a relationship with and the reason is because God said so.
God Protects Your Heart
God gets the glory because He cares about her so much that He wanted to break it down and reveal to her that He doesn’t approve of just anyone seeking to hold her heart. Also, God is a good father, and He is protective of His sons and daughters.
Singles, we have to ask ourselves: Will God approve of the next (or current) person I date? Is he the one God wants for me to be with? Don’t settle for less because you see other people in relationships or getting engaged, married, and starting families.
Don’t Settle Just Because You’re Feeling Left Out
We’re well into wedding and anniversary season so just be prepared for those “I need a boo” feelings. Don’t be discouraged by a lot of people progressing in their next chapters; you never know if they may be settling themselves.
This issue has been brought up before that many Christian couples are getting divorced, reasons including rushing and going by their own will and not the will of God. Don’t compromise yourself by having a mate or going out on a date. God wants us to stick to our convictions of the spirit and be on guard because the enemy will come to tempt us.
Being at the Same Level of Intimacy with Him
I have to share my own experience in this area. I dated someone for two months, and I didn’t have the feeling within me to go forward and be in a committed relationship with this guy.
The Holy Spirit told me to wait a month after this gentleman asked me to be exclusive. I told him “let’s wait a month” and he complied. By the time next month rolled around, we stopped dating! Basically, we were on two different levels of intimacy. I didn’t want to compromise on that and he respected that enough to walk away.
Learn to Discern
It may feel bad to be rejected over something God is asking you to do, but the present suffering will not compare to that broken heart, that STD, that unwanted baby, that guilt and shame that comes from not following “your first mind” which many of us know as discernment. The present suffering will also not compare to the glory of getting someone God approves of or better yet, brings into your life at the right time.
“For what was glorious has no glory now in comparison with the surpassing (better) glory. And if what was transitory (brief) came with glory, how much greater is the glory of that which lasts!” –2 Corinthians 3:10-11 NIV
Be Mindful of Wannabe Relationships
I was told that the situation was a test for me to see the false before the real. I don’t want to chop it up to just that because the guy was nice to me and had a lot of potentials, but that’s how the enemy works, y’all.
We can date the most attractive, on fire for Christ person, but if God says wait, slow down or stop and do a 180, you’ve got to listen! God knows your desires and the devil does too; he will do anything to keep you off your track to righteousness, including distracting you with wannabe relationships that God doesn’t approve of.
“If I didn’t listen to God, I would’ve made the mistake again of continuing to date someone He didn’t approve of.”
God Is Preparing You for True Love
If you are single and are going back into dating, be on your guard and do not harden your heart when God comes to you with a whisper or conviction about that person you want to spend time with. He doesn’t approve because He wants what’s best for you; we were not created to settle and be “content” with what we have. We were made to have a true reflection of His love in the form of another person if that is His desire for us individually.
Always Pray and Pursue God
Now, there will be times when you may not hear anything from God while in your dating season. Those are the times when you may be getting tested, to apply what you’ve learned so far to the situation at hand. Continue to pray and pursue God in the Bible to get the answers you may be looking for.
Don’t mistake the silence for disapproval, just continue to give God your time, and don’t get distracted by the person you are with. Your discernment, intuition, and wisdom will alert you if something is not right; that’s the Holy Spirit at work.
BMWK ladies, here’s a video from xSoulBeautyx about waiting for the man God wants for you. Watch this and ask yourself if you’re in a current relationship, “Is he the one God wants for me?”
You deserve real love even if you never received it or saw it in your younger days. After reading this article, you can now ask yourself, “Is he the one?” and know the answer right away. We’ve got to hold on and not grow weary of being single. Stay connected and close to God. He wants what’s best for you, so leave the temporary and false satisfaction as my friend did, so He can prepare you for someone with His divine seal of approval. The need to feel loved isn’t confined to marriage or even romance—everyone has a desire to be fulfilled by meaningful relationships and unconditional love. Click here to find out what your “Love Language” is as a single.
BMWK fam, is he the one God wants you to be with? How do you know? Tell us in the comments section below!
Up Next: 7 Of The Most Challenging Dating Issues Facing Christian Singles
Editor’s Note: This article was originally published on July 28, 2014, and has been updated for quality and relevancy.