Harpo shouts “You ain’t my mammy!!! ” and follows it by throwing a rock at Celie’s head. This was Celie’s first introduction to her step kids in the movie ,The Color Purple. (check out the movie clip below about six minutes and 50 seconds in.)
At first when I saw Ms. Celie get hit by that rock, I was shocked. And this is going to sound awful, keep in mind I was young when that movie came out, but my friends and I used to replay that scene over and over and just laugh and laugh. Now that I am an adult and I have my own blended family.. it’s not so funny. It is definitely a challenge to bring together a blended family.
On Oprah.com, divorce expert, M. Gary Neuman, provides Three Ways to Nurture a Blended Family
1. Create new family traditions. “This family needs something new to work around. So you have the Saturday night movie night that, no matter what, we’re all going to be together,” Gary says.
2. Only the biological parents should discipline. “This is a big mistake a lot of people make and I daresay there are a lot of men who kind of go off and leave the new step-mom to do a lot of things with the kids. Don’t put yourself in that position because every single kid will look at that step-mom and say, ‘Who died and made you boss?'” Gary says.
3. Use similar rules for same-aged children. “So as two parents, you have to sit down and say, ‘How are we going to change the rules so they are more common for all of our children?'”
What do you think about those 3 tips..especially #2? Do you think it is better if the Step-parent does not discipline the Step-kids? Please comment back and share your experiences with us.