One of the greatest pleasures of being single is dating. It can be a lot of fun and adventure if you are willing and committed to enjoying the process. Having a good dating life boils down to a few key points. If you implement these points into your dating habits, you will find that dating doesn’t have to seem like you’re out to chase the man or woman of your dreams like you are hunting wild game. Going out and enjoying someone else’s company doesn’t have to seem like a chore, it can be fun and something to look forward to if you keep these ideas in mind:
1. Remember, You are Under No Obligation
Other than the societal norms of being punctual and polite, you have no obligation to any man or woman you might be dating. You want to get to know someone, not immediately become their husband-to-be or wife-to-be. Each case is different, some will move faster than others. That said, be fully aware that you are in complete control of the situation. If it’s not fun, if it doesn’t work for you anymore, if the compatibility or attraction is lacking, you can leave the situation. Singles sometimes “settle” because it’s been a while since they have had someone and they feel they can’t “do better.” You can and will do better! The only obligation you have is to yourself to patiently wait to find the person who has been designed just for you.
2. Be Open to the Possibilities
It turns out that the lady of my dreams was someone that I initially declined a blind date request from my friend to go out with her. I’m glad I changed my mind! If you want to date and really enjoy your dating life, be open to all it has to offer. It’s ok to date someone who doesn’t fit your normal “type.” It’s a good thing to date people who don’t bring to the table what you bring to the table. It’s cool to date someone with either a higher or lower income than you. It’s ok to date someone who has hair of a different texture or skin of a different color than yours. You never know what you could learn about someone else and what you may learn about yourself if you expand how you think in terms of who you date, what a date consists of and what the date may lead to. Being open is a huge factor in every single person’s mindset when it comes to dating.
3. Date with a Purpose
I have written on this topic several times, because your intent is a priority when dating. Dating is like everything else we do in life, we want to have a vision, goals and a purpose for doing what we are doing. What this does is set some (maybe not rigid, but some) parameters around what you are doing and what you want to get out of a dating relationship. If you know you’re dating with the idea of marriage as the goal, then when you find out someone is not marriage material for you, you have the responsibility to your vision to move on. Marriage is only one purpose. Dating can be to get to know many people and find out what you really want and need out of a mate. I know people who went from their parents’ house to a marriage and never had time to find out what they wanted in a mate before they did it.
Dating can help to alleviate this. Dating will often show you what you don’t want in a person to help you figure out what you actually want in a mate. You owe it to yourself to be intentional about your objective when dating. You will find since you know what you want, you will enjoy your dating life because you will search out people who fulfill what you are looking for.
If you can remember you are under no obligation (this is about the experience, nothing more), remain open and stay on track with your purpose while dating, you will find the selection process will be easier in dating. You will also be aware that no matter who you date, if these points don’t align, it may be time to re-evaluate the relationship. Dating should always feel like a lot of fun, never something that is overwhelming or a tedious process.