If there is once thing I know for sure, it’s the fact that every couple has to experience change. Even if your relationship is happy and healthy, change will occur. It’s inevitable.
But change is not a bad thing. Change is a natural part of life. What determines your level of happiness and success is not your ability to avoid change, but your ability to manage it. What do you do when the unexpected happens? How do you handle major life transitions?
I am currently preparing to transition from being the mother of two to being a mother of three. Preparing for life as a family of five is exciting. It’s also a little scary. But my husband and I refuse to let this new addition catch us off guard. We know that we have to take steps to prepare. And yes, we know that we can’t prepare for every possibly scenario. But we also know that the more prepared we are, the easier this transition will be for all five of us.
Whether it’s joining two families, divorce, a new child, a major move, financial challenges, or any other transition you face, you have to do your best to be prepared. That preparation will allow you to manage change in the healthiest possible way.
Here are five things couples can do to prepare for major life transitions.
Ask for help.
We live in a very individualist society. Everyone wants to handle their own business and do things alone. But we were not designed to do this thing called life all alone. And we especially need help when we are preparing for a transition. Whether you are in need of emotional support or the type of support that comes in the form of childcare, meals, or physical labor, do not hesitate to turn to the people you love and trust for the support you need. It will help ease any major transition and that is a blessing you can’t ignore.
Improve your communication skills.
Nothing makes life easier to manage with your spouse than effective communication. You can’t make assumptions and you have to be able to talk about your fears, anxieties, and concerns openly. You also need to be able to express your hopes and dreams. When that line of communication remains open and you are able to stay on the same page, it makes all the difference in your ability to face a major life transition as a unit.
Do your research
Although this isn’t possible with unexpected events, we often do have the opportunity to research and prepare for many of the transitions in our lives. When you are able to research options and possibilities, you certainly should. The more information you have, the more prepared you are to make the best decisions for yourselves and your family. A well-informed decision is often your best decision.
A well-informed decision is often your best decision.
Be flexible
You have to be flexible as a unit if you want to manage change and transitions without losing your minds. Flexibility may seem trivial, but it really is a skill you need to work on. If you get so stuck on things being a certain way, you really don’t give yourself the space to explore different possibilities that may very well work for your family. Sure, you can’t bend on everything, but you should try your best to develop the ability to be flexible when it’s needed.
Have a plan
If you fail to plan, you are planning to fail. I’m sure you’ve heard that before, right? Well there is definitely some truth to it. If you know your family is about to face a transition, plan for it. Talk things out and put a plan in place. You may have to make adjustments along the way, but being prepared allows you to handle a transition with focus and grace, and that’s a beautiful thing.
BMWK family, how does your family prepare for major transitions?