At a recent family gathering during a buffet style dinner. I made my husband a plate. After giving it to him I made my own plate. Once I sat down a “family friend” and I use the word “friend” very loosely, made this comment, “that couldn’t be me.”
I thought very carefully about ignoring this by walking away, but my Leo got the best of me and I asked. “What do you mean by that?” She went on to explain how she could never be the kind of wife that was submissive, and then went off on a mini tirade about how marriage should be equal, etc… Wait. What? You got all that because I made my husband’s plate? Really ma’am?
Now, I didn’t trip on the fact that she isn’t a wife and that she barely knows me. But I did wonder what made her make the comment and out loud. (Why do people do that?) This is where you staying in your own lane comes in handy. Speak about what you know. I could have let her know that I am not required to, but that I love serving him his food. I could have informed her that I also enjoy keeping a clean house for him to come home to. I might have let her know that I get to stay at home with my kids because he goes out and works every day. Or that I am also living my dreams as an entrepreneur because my husband supports me while I do that.
But I thought about it and decided that it didn’t really matter and that she was probably bitter about something else and took it out on me because I happened to be in her presence. Or, maybe she’s just a hater. Who knows. What I do know is that people need to mind their own business. So I came up with this list of why you should stay out of other people’s business.
Please remember these 7 items before you open your mouth and speak on someone else’s situation:
- What people do in their own lives that does not affect you, IS NOT YOUR BUSINESS
- You should be focusing on your own problems, I’m sure you have some
- Think about how you feel when people prejudge you or get into your business.
- If you don’t have something nice to say, at least be quiet.
- No one cares to hear your every thought. (That’s what Twitter is for.)
- Think before you speak (This tip is really handy. It helps you to not make too much a fool of yourself in front of others)
- You should spend that extra energy working out. This increases your endorphins and therefore makes you feel happier. Happy people have no time to be negative or worry about what someone else is doing.
I hope these reasons are enough for you to stop meddling. You can apply this advice where ever you deem necessary. The bottom line is when you openly speak in judgement or negativity it just makes you look pathetic. It also tends to make the people in earshot desire you less. Who knows, your future mate may have been in the room. A true sign of how a person feels about themselves is how they treat and respond to other people. Be careful, your self esteem (or lack there of) is showing!
BMWK – How do you handle people that speak out of turn to you?