If for any minute you doubt that there are truly happily married people out there, here is yet another beautiful couple to inspire you in your own marriage (or future marriage). Anjuan and Aneika met in college at the University of Texas at Austin. He studied Electrical Engineering, and she studied Management Information Systems. Although their college romance ended up not working out and they lost touch for a couple of years, as fate would have it, they both ended up in Houston. Today, Anjuan works as a Technology Consultant with an MBA, and Aneika, who earned her PhD, works as a college professor and teaches Business. They have three kids, ages 7, 5, and 4, and are passionate about being a positive advocate for married couples. Their story is a true testament of their faith and trust in God.
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Aneika: No.
Anjuan: I hoped she would be.
When you reconnected years later, what were your private thoughts about each other?
Aneika: I thought Anjuan was a good friend.
Anjuan: I thought that even if we didn’t develop a romantic relationship, I wanted to be there for Aneika and be a part of her life.
Anjuan, when did you realize that you wanted her to be your wife?
Anjuan:“It wasn’t one particular moment. I saw her love for God, love for her family, and the quality of her character.
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Aneika, when did you realize that you wanted to spend the rest of your life with Anjuan?
Aneika: After Anjuan and I spent significant amount of time talking, fasting, and asking God for His will about our future together. I must say this was easier to do since we refrained from sexual intercourse until after we were married.
You were engaged after dating for only six months. Were there any naysayers that thought that it should have been longer at the time, or was everyone around you on board?
Anjuan: There were no naysayers in my circle of friends. But, they probably knew I was determined to marry Aneika.
Aneika: Yes. Some of my friends thought it might be best to spend more time in a romantic relationship since we were friends for so long.
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Anjuan: Faith has played an immensely important role in our marriage. We try to have a marriage with three participants: God and the two of us.
Aneika: It is what has kept us together.
The both of you work with various programs for married couples. Why is this type of work important to you?
Anjuan: I love being married, and I am an advocate for marriage. However, I think that our society either totally romanticizes marriage or sees it as a prison sentence. Between those two extremes lies the truth of what it means to sustain a marriage, and I try to present a balanced view of marriage to other couples.
Aneika: Marriage is the basic building block of society. When it fails, a lot of other things fail with it. Healthy marriages are the key to maintaining and sustaining solid relationships in a family. This includes relationships between parents and children as well as between siblings and extended family members.
How do you deal with conflict when it arises in your marriage?
Anjuan: We try to give each other the benefit of the doubt and assume that the conflict was not intentionally caused through malice or ill feelings. That helps us talk through the conflict without the cloud of anger.
Aneika: We try to talk through it and see things from the perspective of the other person.
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Anjuan: I think we both see discipline as a way to guide our children to appropriate behavior. So, that includes verbally explaining the desired behavior and how their actions don’t align with the desired behavior. We both believe in punishment when necessary which may include temporarily removing a privilege or, occasionally, corporal punishment.
What is the legacy that you want to leave your children?
Anjuan: We want them to feel that they discovered and fulfilled their God given purpose.
Aneika: We want them to feel loved and accepted.
Thank you so much Anjuan and Aneika for sharing your beautiful story with us.
BMWK — Can you relate to this couple? Be sure to leave a comment below telling us what inspired you most about their story.