By now you may have seen this couple’s love story on sites such as Essence or Huffington Post. This couple has a fairytale ending that most can only say was a divine encounter. After being forced to close down her massage therapy business, and losing everything she had including her home, Ressurrection was forced to go to a homeless shelter. No one could’ve predicted that it was there that she would meet the love of her life: Deven a homeless military veteran who served in the army. Instead of a traditional wedding reception, they celebrated their special day, by going out to feed the homeless after exchanging their vows.
She is the mother of a seventeen-year-old daughter, a full-time speaker, author, advocate and entrepreneur, and together they founded Glory Soldiers Global, an organization focusing on assisting others in overcoming the effects of child sexual abuse, including but not limited to: homelessness and poverty. In this interview, they share how this organization came to be, how homelessness increased their communication, as well as advice for those still looking for Mr. or Mrs. Right, and more.
BMWK: How did your individual relationship experiences prior to finding each other, prepare you for the relationship you built together?
Ressurrection: My previous relationship experiences were full of people who were not the ones. My husband is in a league by himself and it is hard to compare anyone to him, that is why I married him. What I can say about my learning experience through those relationships are that I was able to see myself in a healthy and unhealthy place. I learned what I needed, what lifted me up and what tore me down.
Deven: I am genuine and giving, but those I’ve previously dated have not been as honest or generous. I have never had a relationship like the one I have with my wife. There are previous women that I did not want to commit to, and others who were not committed to me. There was a mutual indescribable connection between Res and I.
Ressurrection: The perfect date for Deven is probably at home watching a movie [laughs]. I am a romantic. I live for and love romance. So, anything that allows me to look into his eyes, hold his hand, and view something beautiful like water, art, or scenery, makes the most beautiful memories for me.
Deven: Res would probably say a moonlit Ocean view of the water, candle-light and some Thai food. And, I agree. A movie would be nice, and Monuments in the Nation’s Capitol.
BMWK: How did you know that you had truly found the one you wanted to spend your life with?
Ressurrection: I heard from God to go to this particular shelter and when I got there I asked for the reason that I was there. I received what I’d like to interpret as a clue, which was to look for selflessness. And, that is what I found in him. All of the confirmations about him came through my hearing from God.
Deven: Men usually are not in a rush to get married. I did want to find someone special but I wanted to take my time.I was thinking that I had to present myself in a certain way. I thought I needed to be at a certain level of success first financially, but after a talk we had, I realized that her partnership was divine.
BMWK: Do you feel that the experience of living in a homeless shelter prepared you for the challenges that marriage would throw your way?
Ressurrection: We certainly had a jump start on revealing everything, and tackling money head on. When you’re starting your life together and one person isn’t already financially successful, or two people aren’t already financially secure, you talk about everything, and face it with or without reservation. I don’t think that homelessness necessarily prepared us so much as starting from the bottom did. The homeless shelter was nothing but a meeting ground.
Deven: The homeless shelter did not prepare us for marriage, but it makes you realize that things can happen in life, and when it does, you press forward. The shelter was a vessel for me to become relentless for my pursuit of happiness. Without that experience, I may not have had the motivation or my wife to push me and drive me to overcome such adversities.
BMWK: What advice can you share with those who are still searching for their Mr. or Mrs. Right?
Ressurrection: I believe there are a few things that you must be clear on when you are “searching” for Mr. or Mrs. Right. The first is, don’t “search” [laughs]. Keep your eyes peeled, however, you want to be more in tune with God’s voice than your own desires. His direction will lead you to each other.
Don’t obsess over it, or make it unhealthy. You want to make it something you are excited about, so you attend marriage conferences, and talk to married people about the secret to a happy marriage, now!
Deven: Pray. Pray about finding someone, and that God would connect you to the right people. And, be open.
BMWK: What advice do you have as it relates to building a strong foundation for your marriage?
Ressurrection: To build a truly strong foundation for marriage I believe you should have a few elements: pre-engagement counseling, a clear set of non-negotiables, and an ability to be totally and completely selfless.
When I was single, right before I met Deven I said, “God I’m not going to tell another man that I’m not having sex until marriage.” However, I said this bold statement to God and followed it by stating that, “If you [God] want me to be celibate, you’ll have to send me someone who you require the same thing from. He will have to have his own relationship with you, and his own convictions.”
When I met Deven, about a week in, he called and said, “I have something to tell you.” He continued, “I’m not having sex until marriage.” I knew he was the one then, but I wanted to make sure that this wasn’t a game. Believe me, it was not.
Deven: My advice would be to follow the five guidelines of a relationship that I use: Love, Trust, Communication, Compromise, and Respect.
Love is the most important. God is love. Love is spiritual and should be handled maturely. Trust is the backbone of a relationship. Without your back, you can’t stand up. Trust offers stability. Communication, it works both ways. You don’t have to compromise about everything but it’s very important to come to an agreement, and that takes communication. Respect is essential for communication and compromise.
BMWK: Please share a little about your organization and the mission.
Ressurrection: From a biblical perspective, that same “Glory” that hovered over the universe as light, is now on the inside of you and me. We believe that if God be magnified from within, we should never be without.
The mission of Glory Soldiers Global is to shatter barriers of oppression, eliminate engineered poverty by educating and assisting homeless people to overcome – not manage, housing and other issues induced by poverty. Additionally our mission is to prevent, intervene and/or facilitate healing in those who have encountered child sexual abuse.Our expectation is to work in the Washington DC Metropolitan Area, where we are both native, expand nationally, and so on as the doors open on our behalf.
A big thanks to Deven and Ressurrection for sharing their story with us at BMWK.
Glory Soldiers Global is currently in need of monetary and/or household items for the housewarming parties that their organization throws every quarter. To volunteer or to find out more information, you can visit their website (www.glorysoldiersglobal.org), Facebook page or follow them on Twitter @AJourneyToLove
BMWK: Be sure to leave some words of love and encouragement for this beautiful couple.