“Your marriage will probably end in divorce.”
I recently received this news following a divorce probability calculator quiz I participated in. But allow me to explain. I recently heard the term “marriage insurance” from my husband, after he’d heard it on a radio show. My curiosity got the best of me, so I had to do some research on the topic.
The first site I came across not only offered divorce insurance policies, but also allowed me to try their divorce probability calculator. Now because I’m thinking all of this was quite humorous, I decided to take the quiz. Well, after it asked me questions about my race, income, how frequently we argue (which is not that frequent by the way) and how often we have a glass of wine (which was also rare), it revealed the shocking news. I was in the very strong probability category. First, as you can imagine, I had a “what the hell” moment. Next, the wording quickly turned my confusion into a deeper desire to take action.
Below is the exact language used in my results:
“The news is not good. You’re amongst a demographic of people that have the lowest long term marriage success rate. What that means is that based on the factors that you indicated, there are many things in your life that significantly contribute to divorce and very few, if any, factors that contribute to a long term successful marriage. Does that mean you should never get married because you’re almost guaranteed to get divorced? Certainly not! Everyone is different and your circumstances may be completely different than someone else who scored much better than you. You may be happily married forever after, but statistically, the odds are against you. However, now you know that based on the 20 factors we know have a significant impact on the outcome of marriage, you scored among the lowest level. That means that you likely have significant obstacles to overcome to ensure that your marriage stays healthy and strong. It will take a lot of effort on your part, but knowing in advance always helps. In your case, we very STRONGLY recommend that you adjust your budget to ensure that you can cover yourself against the unexpected. In any event, we wish you the best of luck!”
What a joke, right? My husband and I initially thought the results were negative because of our race. However, after a little more thought I realized it has everything to do with the company wanting to sell one of their divorce insurance policies. More than likely, everyone receives the same results. With that being said, the line that hit me hardest was “you are amongst a demographic of people that have the lowest long term marriage success rate.” It hit me to the core and reminded me why the work that I am doing, along with BMWK and the other writers here is so necessary. I never want to see this statement again.
I’m ready for new headlines
….like “Black Marriage is on the Rise” or “Divorce rates, Lowest They Have Ever Been”, just to name a few.
I am confident about the current state of marriage and very hopeful about the future. In particular, mine, because I promise to do everything within my power to keep my marriage alive and well. My husband and I allow God to lead our union and we are committed to one another. We also surround ourselves with others who encourage our marriage. It is a must that we all motivate our married family and friends while challenging them to positively contribute to the health of their relationships, as we do with our own. We should also remember it takes a village to support a marriage.
BMWK, what are your thoughts on a divorce probability calculator and divorce insurance? What are you doing to protect your marriage from divorce?