There is no shortage of bad advice available to hinder if not altogether ruin your relationship. Most of the time, it comes from well-meaning family and friends (who are likely passing on information that hasn’t served them well if they thought about it). They mean well, but things won’t end well if you heed this advice. Here’s some to add to your list of “advice not to follow.”
If You Love Them, Let Them Go
If you love someone, let them go. If they are yours, they will come back. If not, they were never yours. That sounds good parting a pairs of lips, especially when woven into a tight beat and catchy melody.
But it doesn’t hold up under scrutiny when applied to your relationship. Sometimes, another old adage comes into play: Out of sight, out of mind. The danger in letting them go is that from their view, having been let go speaks to a lack of value. We fight for what we love, right?
Men Like a Challenge
Ladies are advised to be elusive with men that they share a mutual interest in. Don’t make yourself “too available” to a man, they are told because “men like a challenge.”
This is one that I am particularly peeved by. It is true that men like a challenge. The question is what men? Which group of men like “the chase” and why? “Manufacturing confusion” may make the pot sweeter for males who like the challenge of preying on women who seem harder to crack. It ups the ante and broadens the victory of winning the woman. Then, once the excitement is over, he’s off to the next thrill, the next “challenge.”
If You Won’t, Another Woman Will
It’s unfortunate to think that women are held hostage by the fear that if they won’t do something then some other woman will.
It’s actually true. Whatever one woman won’t do, another one will. But what kind of man would leave a woman he loves in this type of predicament? The answer is none.
What type of woman would subject herself to this type of treatment from a man? The answer is a desperate one. Men like desperate women, but only the men who are looking for easy prey, certainly not any man who’s looking to love a woman.
This is all “great advice” for any woman who is looking to remain single—but not just single but single with excessive wounds. I suspect women who are open to advice want that advice to be useful. This advice is useful in reverse. In other words, do the opposite if you want a beneficial return on your investment. It may be easier just to ignore it altogether.
BMWK, what other outdated advice do you hear that sets women up to be single?