The last few weeks I have been on cloud nine because I was named director of the marriage ministry at my church. I am excited about this ministry because of my passion for relationships and marriage and because this particular ministry is new to my church. I don’t take this responsibility lightly as the couples in our community need much prayer, encouragement, and support.
Being assigned to this role brings a lot of responsibility. Praying for and ministering to couples all come with the territory. A major part of this ministry was creating a vision and mission statement. Sitting down and putting down on paper all the ideas I have for marriages and sharing God’s vision of marriage with others is no easy task.
My first step was to pray over the ministry and the couples that will benefit. After prayer and as I created the vision, it hit me. As the marriage ministry leader my marriage is on display and I must lead by example. Any time you are in a leadership position people are going to look to you for guidance in that particular area. And the expectation will be for me and my husband to display a healthy marriage and in a way become a mentor couple. I am not one to run from a challenge, so I jump fully into this role with both feet.
Thinking about this position brings to mind the couples I consider my own marriage mentors and what I am learning by observing them. The couples I admire consistently display the following qualities:
- They have a strong connection that can be felt whenever you are in their presence. In some cases I have even noticed them anticipating the other’s needs.
- They value one another. The communication is delivered with gentleness and respect and they only speak positive words about their mate.
- There is joy. It isn’t fake or phony; they are truly happy to be together.
- Others want what they have. Their marriage is often desired by those in their company. Single people are hoping to have a marriage like theirs.
- They still seem to be very attracted to one another. A few of the couples have been together for 10+ years, but the way they look at one another confirms the fire is still burning.
- They completely support one another. The couples I admire always lift one another up. I often hear them promoting the other and never having an ill word to say about their spouse.
- They have made it through storms and are still going strong.
- They understand and demonstrate the true meaning of commitment, sacrifice and dedication.
While I take on this huge new task I am encouraged by all my mentor couples and I pray that my marriage will also be an inspiration to others.
BMWK Family, do you have a mentor couple? If so, what qualities do they possess that you admire the most?