So, my wedding is 10 days away. Excuse me for a moment:
Yep, you read that right. 10. DAYS. AWAY. This journey started in January (2014), and here we are. Time literally flew by. I’ve learned so much during this process. First, let me say that wedding planning is for the birds. And, this better be my first and only wedding, because ain’t nobody got time to go through this again. Nope, I ain’t gone do it. Also, did you know that funerals AND weddings bring out the foolery that’s lying dormant within your family? Emotions are EVERYWHERE, when all you want to do is just get married already. Last, but not least, you discover who’s happy for you, and unfortunately who’s not.
I’ve had my share of discovering who isn’t truly happy for this season of my life, but I choose not to focus on that. Instead, I’d rather share my own struggle of being happy for other brides whose moment came before mine. I can’t pretend like I don’t remember those days, because just last year I was as single as a dollar bill. Since I’ll be a 30 year old bride, I spent my entire 20’s single and it didn’t feel good most of the time.
Do you know how many bridal showers I went to wondering when was it going to be my turn? I can’t tell you how many times I attended a wedding, and cried myself to sleep that night, because I felt like God forgot about me. Life felt mundane, and almost purposeless. I couldn’t understand why God was allowing me to go through this lonely season of being single, that was seeming to last forever.
However, one thing I never did was refuse to celebrate with others when love would find them. Would I be hurt? Of course. Confused? Indeed. Slightly jealous? You better believe it. BUT, they would NEVER ever know it. I always celebrated with them, showing up with the best gift, and volunteering my services for whatever they needed during the wedding process. Why? Even though at one point I gave up on love, I still believed one day it would be MY season, and I’d want others to celebrate with me.
Rejoice with those who rejoice. Romans 12:15
Rejoice with those who rejoice? What does that mean? It’s simple. If someone is rejoicing, rejoice with them. Period. In my opinion, this should happen especially for weddings. Why? Do you know how many people are searching for real love and will never find it? And since I believe love is a gift from God, it should be celebrated. Unfortunately, we allow pride, anger, and jealousy to prevent us from participating in a once in a lifetime moment. Sad.
The truth of the matter is, your moment is coming. I What if I would have allowed my emotions to guide me and act a fool every time someone got married before me Chile...I would have absolutely no support for my big day, and probably no friends. I can’t thank God enough for covering me and helping me realize that a pity party was so unnecessary. Clearly he had a plan for me. Whew. Thank God I didn’t abort it by acting a fool, and allowing jealousy and envy to take root in my heart.
A good friend of mine got engaged a few weeks ago. I can’t tell you how happy I am for her. As we spoke over the phone, I told her “I’m so happy for you, and I can only hope I’d have the same joy for you, even if I wasn’t getting married myself.” I meant that, and she completely understood where I was coming from.
Sometimes it’s easier to be happy for someone, when you have amazing things happening in your own life. But what about when there isn’t anything exciting happening for you? What if everything is currently terrible?
Guess what? Seasons change. This season won’t always be THIS season. Get it? I really hope you do. And to let you guys in on a little secret: If we fail to be sincerely happy for people, it only gets worse. You not being happy for their engagement transfers into you not being happy for their marriage, which transfers into you not celebrating their new home, and new baby. Do you see how this can turn into a vicious cycle?
There are PLENTY of challenges going around. I challenge you to be honest with God about your emotions and allow Him to help you. Rejoice with the “bride to be”. As a bride getting married in a few days, trust me, we need it. But don’t fret, your moment is coming 🙂