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Why Mother’s Day Shouldn’t Be A Big Deal To Moms

By Tara Pringle Jefferson

I was doing my usual morning browse through my friend’s Facebook statuses and I found a Mother’s Day post written by a stay-at-home mom friend.

She wrote that while she celebrates the day, it isn’t that big of a deal to her because she feels loved and appreciated every single day. She detailed how her kids give her foot rubs for no reason, they compliment her dinners, and her husband goes out of his way to make sure she’s comfortable.

Hmm, I thought to myself as I read. Interesting.

Then I went back to Facebook and kept reading the statuses of all the mothers I have as friends.

For some, it was business as usual, save for a shout-out at church or people posting on their Facebook wall. They were still up with the kids, doing laundry, braiding hair, ironing clothes, breaking up fights. For some, there was no breakfast in bed, no special presents, no brunch, nada.

For other mothers whose family members went all out, you could see how much just the slightest bit of appreciation meant to them. They truly didn’t need an all-star breakfast or fancy new jewelry. Just a simple, “You’re a great mom” was enough for them.

It pains me how many moms are hungry for just a little bit of appreciation. (And I’m well aware that this probably goes double for the dads when Father’s Day rolls around.) Some moms I know anticipate Mother’s Day all year long, using it as motivation to get through the most difficult days, when they truly feel no one understands the amount of work they put in to keep everything running smoothly.

I fall somewhere in the middle. Yes, it’s nice that my husband gets me dinner on Mother’s Day, and puts the kids to bed without me – I truly appreciate that. But I (like the women from the Honey Do series) feel that an ounce more appreciation on regular days goes so far.

It is easy to celebrate Mom and all she does on the second Sunday in May, but then what happens on the second Monday in May and all the days that follow? Where is the breakfast in bed? Where are the roses? Where are the dads stepping up to make dinner and giving their wives backrubs? Where are the kids making cards saying, “I love you, Mom!”

I realize this sounds a lot like the anti-Valentine’s Day argument I hear each year, and really, for the first time, I get it. So much of motherhood (parenting in general, really) is doing things without expectation of praise or even acknowledgment, really. Some days it is truly a thankless job.  Moms yearn to know they are appreciated, not just in the spring, but all year long.

Moms, do you feel appreciated 365 days of the year, or is Mother’s Day the only day when you truly feel special and appreciated? Share your 2011 Mother’s Day stories below!

Tara Pringle Jefferson is a freelance writer, blogger and PR professional living in Ohio with her husband and two kids. She’s managing editor of BlackAndMarriedWithKids.com. She’s also the author of  Make It Happen: The Young Mommy Guide To Creating The Career You Crave.  Follow her on Twitter or check out  her blog for her insights on what it means to be a mom, wife, student, writer, and about three other labels she’s too tired to remember.

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