If you want to find your soulmate, you have to get good at mastering first dates! I know first dates can range from awkward to disastrous, especially when you have those “oh-no-somebody-say-something-please” moments.
The purpose of a first date is really just to relax, have fun, and see if there’s enough there to see each other again. The key is to stop worrying about what you’re going to talk about or whether or not the other person will like you, and focus on enjoying the moment.
Let me help make dating easier, less nerve-wrecking, and more fun by sharing 3 questions to ask on a first date. These simple, yet powerful questions will help you make deeper connections with your date and help you quickly discover whether or not the man you’re talking to is relationship material.
1. If you want to discover if he’s the relationship–type you could ask:
“What was the longest relationship you’ve ever had?”
If he vents about his ex all night, you’ll know he’s not quite ready for a healthy relationship with you. If he’s NEVER had a long-term relationship, it could be a red flag that he doesn’t know how to commit. If he’s nostalgic about someone in his past, don’t get offended. It could be a sign he knows how to start and maintain a serious relationship, unless of course, it feels like he’s not over her.
2. If you want to find out what his core values are, you could ask:
“What was the biggest decision you’ve ever made?”
You can find out a lot about a person by how they make important decisions. You’ll discover if he’s a risk-taker or if he’s more of a thinker and planner. You can also uncover his sense of morals and life’s values (that is, if he’s a high-quality, relationship-minded man).
3. If you want to know if he has goals, don’t ask him directly. Instead, ask:
“What do you like most about your job?”
You’ll discover what his dreams are with this simple question. His answer will reveal whether he is satisfied with his career OR if he really wants to do something else. Does he feel like his work matters or does he have a bigger vision for his life? This question, and the conversation that will open up as a result, will give you the answers.
It’s best to ask these types of questions with an “I-am-genuinely-interested-in-getting-to-know-you” tone. Don’t use the interviewer or investigator approach or you could scare him off. Stay open and you’ll encourage him to open up too!
BMWK, let’s talk more about first dates. What’s your greatest challenge?