So this weekend my wife and I had a yard sale, and even though I was dreading it all week, it was actually fun! The process of sorting, then setting up, then wheelin’ and dealin’ as we made sales was pretty cool. Throughout the process we bickered a bit about who would do what, then who was going let what go.

I wanted to keep my old “vintage” throwback jerseys, and she wanted to keep some of those random kitchen appliances that she NEVER uses! All in all though this yard sale got me to thinking about all of the “clutter” we keep in our relationships and marriages. Come….let’s talk about it!

The Past

For so many of us, our past hurts are cluttering our minds, hearts, and our relationships. We can’t quite seem to get on and stay on that path to happiness in our relationships because of what happened “back then!” We say we forgave but we keep bringing it up. We say we addressed it and let it go, yet it’s obvious through your passive aggression that you’re still holding on.

Maybe it was something that happened before you met your mate or maybe it’ s something your current mate brought you back to, but regardless it’s still cluttering your relationship NOW and it’s time to clean it up.

Other Peoples’ Opinions

For many of us we are more concerned about what everyone else will think than we are concerned about what our mates think. Your friends are always in your ear offering up their negative opinions that they disguise as “advice.” Some of your family members always seem to interject their own opinions about the state of your mate & relationship.

These opinions constantly clutter your mind and make you question decisions you’ve made in a mate or even in a marriage. It may be time to clear all of that clutter and gain some clarity! When it comes down to it, the opinions of people about your relationship that have no stake IN your relationship do not need to take root in your mind.

Unrealistic Expectations

For some reason you are still holding on to the fairy tale description of what a relationship is and who your mate should be. Instead of accepting who your mate is, you are still upset because he or she isn’t matching that big long master list of traits you thought your ideal mate would have.

Turns out he isn’t making six figures yet and she doesn’t have the Instagram model body. Turns out that sometimes he gets on your last nerve and sometimes she is hormonal, but because of your unrealistic expectations you can’t understand it. When you stop letting those unrealistic expectations clutter your mind and your marriage you can truly learn to love and embrace your mate AS IS!

“Everything must go!” “Time to clear the clutter” I said this over and over as I motivated myself to sell everything we had cleared from the house for the yard sale, and I hope that you will have the same mindset when it comes to the things that are cluttering up your relationship or marriage.

BMWK: Do you have things cluttering your mind from your past?