After about 6 months of being married, I realized something that I pray every unmarried person will take very serious. Every second I spent before I said I do, was preparation for marriage. All the things I accomplished and all the things I failed to do contributed to my present day marriage. Before I married, I was a huge proponent for preparing for marriage. But now that I am married, I cannot stress how important it is to prepare for the covenant that changes everything.
When I teach on this, the first response is, “Well, I don’t have anyone to date to prepare for marriage.” Dating is not the only way to prepare for marriage and also can be very dangerous if not done God’s way.
Here are a 25 ways to prepare for marriage other than dating.
- Healthy friendships with the opposite sex.
- Get a roommate. (same sex)
- Spend time with a married couple that inspires you to be married.
- Learn how to cook. (Poor eating habits is very unattractive and destructive to yourself.)
- Establish the foundation of God’s purpose for your life.
- Read books on marriage.
- Attend conferences on preparing for marriage and relationships.
- Identify your strength and weaknesses in relationships.
- Establish a consistent prayer & devotional life.
- Get financial intelligence.
- Go to college.
- Examine the good and bad of your parent’s marriage.
- Serve at your local church.
- Learn how to deal with conflict with your friends.
- Go on a mission trip to another country with a team.
- Take faith risks for God to break fear and learn obedience.
- Examine all your failed friendships and see why things went sour.
- Keep your home/room/closet/car clean. (No one wants a dirty spouse)
- Get a hobby.
- Become a glass house for your close friends. (Transparency as a normal part of your life.)
- Ask your “real” friends what are areas of your character need development every 3-6 months.
- Learn when to say yes, and when to say NO. (self control)
- Work hard. (if you don’t want to marry a lazy person, then don’t be lazy yourself)
- Develop a healthy lifestyle.
- Get a biblical understanding of the role of a husband and wife in a Godly marriage.
BMWK – what else can you add to this list? How did you prepare for marriage?
BC says
Thank you, this is great advice. Sometimes, I get tired of reading marriage books, etc. because it’s not something I will use immediately (so I think), because more often than not I find myself applying that information to my friendships! THX!
Jamal says
Yeah, I agree marriage books can become a bit mundane due to not having an immediate testing place, but friendships are a great place to try out what you’re learning.
Renee says
Excellent list! With the exception of getting a room mate, I’ll rely on my college one, there are five things that I’m working on, so I guess I’m on my way!
Jamal says
Great to hear!
Christian Louboutin Pumps says
WOW just what I was looking for. Came here by searching for preparing for marriage
Louis Vuitton says
I think that what you said made a lot of sense.
But, think about this, suppose you were to write a
awesome title? I ain’t saying your information is not good., however suppose you
added a headline that makes people desire more? I mean 25 Ways Other than Dating to
Prepare for Marriage | BlackandMarriedWithKids.com is a little vanilla.
You should glance at Yahoo’s home page and
watch how they create news titles to grab viewers to open the links.
You might try adding a video or a picture or two to get people excited about what you’ve got to say.
In my opinion, it could make your website a little bit
more interesting.
Beats Headphones says
Thanks for sharing your thoughts about preparing for marriage.
Regards
Christian Louboutin Boots says
Terrific post however , I was wanting to know if you could write
a litte more on this subject? I’d be very thankful if you could
elaborate a little bit further. Appreciate it!
Jamal Miller says
Yes, you can go to http://www.marriedandyoung.com/25waysthebook to purchase a copy of the book! Let me know how you enjoy it.