by Harriet Hairston
There’s a silly little song I heard when I was a little girl that has been playing in my mind as of late:
You’ve gotta accentuate the positive, eliminate the negative and latch on to the affirmative. Don’t mess with Mr. In-Between.
Mr. In-Between and I had a love thing going on that almost wrecked my marriage. Let me tell you what he and his twin sister look like to prevent you from falling for the same pandemonium he caused in my marriage:
- Mr. or Miss In-Between tells you that you are too good for whatever negative situation you’re in.
- If that “situation” happens to include your spouse, Mr. or Miss In-Between won’t argue with you when you begin to think you’re too good for your spouse.
- Mr. or Miss In-Between cuts off the circulation of your unconditional love for your spouse and begins to cause you to make demands instead of maintaining your desire for your spouse.
- Mr. or Miss In-Between causes you to look at your circumstance through the eyes of regret instead of accepting the challenge to make lasting change in your life.
Mr. In-Between is a no good sucka! To permanently boot him (or his twin sister) out of your life and mindset, the following exercises will help:
- Put your mind on a greater force than you. For me, that force is Jesus. Allow Him to guide you away from Mr. or Miss In-Between and towards your purpose in life.
- Accentuate your assets (spouse, children, health, friends, family…the stuff that really matters) and place the majority of your focus upon them.
- If you think one of your assets might fail, formulate in your mind a mental picture of that asset succeeding. Your thoughts will become a vehicle to that mental picture materializing.
- Keep your mind and thoughts on the high end of the spectrum.
Even if the glass is half empty, drink it to the bottom and ask God for a refill. Your cup is bound to overflow sooner or later! In the meantime, continue to accentuate the positive, eliminate the negative and latch on to the affirmative. Kick Mr. or Miss In-Between to the curb!
God bless!
Harriet
Thank you for this very poignant and timely piece of encouragement, that happens to be confirmation of words of wisdom from an Elder at my church. It's so easy for us, even as Christians, to allow our circumstances to beat us up to the point of wanting “OUT” of our negative situations. As much as I want “OUT”, I want my life and my marriage to be pleasing to God, and that's what shapes my decisions and actions. This article has served as a reminder to me (if nobody else), and I appreciate it!
Harriet I just don't understand why you are peeping over my backyard fence??? lol Thank you for this post! It was definitely needed.
Girl, quiet as it's kept, I'm just nosy like that. LOL Seriously, I appreciate the fact that it helped…I was losing my mojo messing with Mr. In-Between. Just ego tripping! SMH It's not worth it.
The sad thing about it is Mr. In Between wasn't a physical person, but all up in my mind and psyche. I'm working on a book now called, “The Voices in my Head,” and Mr. In Between was definitely one I had to boot out!
WOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Harriett u ROCK!!!!!!!!!!!! This was a much needed post!!! U just don't seem to amaze me with your articles/posts!!!!! This website just keeps teaching me and bringing my life SO MUCH NEEDED BALANCE!!!! ILUVMESUMU!!!!!!!
Thank you, and I praise God that it reached out to you. For the past month or so I've been so negative…out of character for me. This article was the genesis of me getting my positive mojo back. LOL
Be blessed!
@Staycee2 – You have expressed my sentiments exactly!! I feel like every time I read one of Harriet's articles, healing is taking place. @ Harriet, thank you for being bold enough to pen what God has given you to speak to the masses. Since I was divinely navigated to this website my attitude is changing. Like Eric Payne's article (giving credit to Mr. Lamar Tyler), I opt to be a “friend of my marriage” instead of an enemy. That “no good sucka” Mr. In-Between does not have freedom speech in our marriage no matter what the conflict meter reads!!
I should have known Aretha Franklin would put her funk on this song!
Check it out! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4IP9h40z0sk
Amen Harriet. This is where I try to keep myself daily, focused on the positive. I just have an attitude of gratitude and just Trust that GOD always knows what's best for me! No Mr. 0r Mrs. In between.
Love it!
This is simple but true.