BMWK: I love it,  So you guys still go to counseling even now?

Chris and Erika: Yes

BMWK: That’s great, that’s really great.

So Chris, were you playing in the NFL Europe prior to your marriage or after you got married?

Chris: When I met Erika I was in the process of transitioning into coaching. So I was still playing NFL and coaching overseas, and I was just over there about four months at a time. When we got married in December, she went over there with me the entire time in 2006. She was there with me the whole time. And she went to all the games with me in Berlin and different places.

Erika: We were living in Germany.

BMWK: And you left NFL coaching there in Europe after that year?

Chris: Yes, the league seized…it shut down. And that’s when I came back home to Atlanta. When we came back we didn’t have a job so, we know based on faith that we would find work and be fine, which we were.

BMWK: There was a recent post about the impact that change can have on a marriage. What has been the biggest change that you guys have had to overcome in your marriage?

Chris: When we came back and we found out that we were pregnant with twins, wouldn’t you say Erika?

Erika: Yeah that was a big change. That was a big transition for us. That was huge…

Chris: Because even though we prayed about it, we knew we were going to have boy and girl twins because that’s what we wanted. But, to actually have it come to pass and to actually have it take place…to actually see these two kids, right there, it was definitely overwhelming. It was joyous and overwhelming at the same time, especially in the first month that they were alive. It was…it was crazy!

Erika: I say at least the first six months were crazy but okay [laughs].

Chris: Oh yeah, yeah they were [laughs]!

BMWK : So, the twins are the oldest?

Chris: Yes. It was just us and in that transition, I think we really had to rely on each other and really lean on each other.

Erika: And Chris was working three jobs at the time, ‘cause I had been on bed rest for four months with the twins and I couldn’t do anything, I literally had to be in bed. I couldn’t rush down to the kitchen to get something to eat, or run down and answer the door. I had to be in bed the whole time for four months.

Chris: So I had to make sure she was straight. I’d come home from the second job make sure everything was in order with her.

BMWK: That alone could be something to drive a lot of couples apart. What would you say is the driving force that helped you guys work together?

Chris: that was what we prayed for…

Erika: I mean yeah that’s what we prayed for but I was committed– my parents were divorced and I didn’t want that for my kids. And I knew that Chris was there for me. I didn’t feel like he would leave us.  I think because of his sports background maybe, he has a big thing about teamwork and us working together to get stuff done. As a coach, he’s a natural encourager. And we prayed a whole lot [laughs].

I was also at home with all three kids and that was another rough patch. That’s what comes in my head first more than anything else when you talk about change. I thought I always wanted to be a stay at home mom.  And that showed me that I didn’t but then at the same time I experienced that guilt of ‘I’m supposed to want to be here with my babies’ so does that make me a bad mom that I don’t? I went through all of that and ended up in therapy, it was crazy! It was very, very overwhelming and I think a lot of women go through that and they’re so afraid to be transparent for fear of judgment.

It got to the point where I told Chris, I need to go see somebody and I’m not just talking, I’m really serious [laughs]. I went every week for two months. I felt like the old me had died, but I found that I just had a new normal. You just have to establish whatever that new normal is, define that. So that was the turning point for me.

BMWK: I can definitely relate to that.