by Elaine Flowers,

You have concluded that you want to be married. Great! But have you asked yourself why? There is nothing wrong with joining another in wedded bliss, but if your reasons are less than wholesome, you should stop yourself quickly. Getting married with the wrong motivations will have you headed for a disaster.

Here are 4 awful reasons to seek marriage.

“I wish I had someone to pay my bills.”

It’s true that a husband can provide and protect, but if this is your reason for wanting a husband you are in for a rude awakening. This is 2014 and the chances are good that a wife will match or out-earn her husband. Having a husband isn’t like winning the lottery and you are now going to be on a life-long shopping spree. It does, however, mean you now have someone to answer to about all financial decisions.

“It would be nice to have sex regularly without guilt of committing a sin.”

Okay, this is a tricky one and should be looked at from a few different angles. You know the cliché about air not being that important until you’re not getting any? Well, sex is kind of like that. It’s not that big a deal until you’re going without, but then the flip side is, it’s only good when you’re not under any obligation to do it.

As a married woman your body belongs to your husband and vice-versa. When two people are sexually compatible there should be minimal problems.  But if they’re not, somebody is feeling used while the other is feeling cheated. Having sex on a regular basis should never be a reason to get married because sex alone cannot sustain the union.

“I’m tired of being alone.”

When people get married because of loneliness, it is a disaster waiting to happen. Marriage is never a cure for loneliness. In fact, there are plenty of married folks who are some of the loneliest people on the planet. When you’re lonely it is tempting to attach yourself to the first person that comes along. And having someone around who doesn’t get you and you don’t really get them is frustrating, to say the least, and leads to loneliness.

“I want to escape this miserable life I’m living.”

With this attitude, chances are good you’ll be jumping from the frying pan into the fire. Until you are complete and whole within yourself you are no good for a partnership. And believing that an escape into another life will rid you of your problems is unrealistic. Whatever your issues are now will most certainly still be your issues when your location and relationship status changes.

Are your reasons for wanting to marry having anything to do with the ministry of marriage? Or is it all for your own self-serving reasons? Society demonizes single people but don’t believe the hype. Yes, marriage is a huge responsibility filled with a lot of hard work, but can also be a wonderful experience.

Elaine Flowers is a professional writer of mainstream fiction residing in Dallas, Texas.  She became a published author in 2004 with the release of her Dallas Morning News bestselling novel, Black Beauty and went on to pen four more books. In 2014 she received her Bachelors of Fine Arts in Creative Writing for Entertainment from Full Sail University and is currently developing a web series. Website: https://www.booksbyelaineflowers.com