Have you ever had a rough time in your marriage? Have you ever caught yourself thinking bad thoughts about your marriage and wonder where those thoughts came from? I’ve caught myself in that situation before.
Negative thoughts would come so easily and quickly and I would find my feelings changing due to the thoughts running through my mind. It was like a conversation going on in my mind. I had to shake myself from those thoughts and question why I was dwelling on things that haven’t happened.
Then I realized those thoughts didn’t come from God and were doing me no good. When I asked how those thoughts got there I heard the Spirit tell me that it was the enemy suggesting things about me, my spouse and my marriage that were untrue.
I’ve shared some scriptures that will help you when you find yourself in a similar situation. You may wonder why the enemy suggests untrue things to torment folk and what can you do about it. The answers start with scripture #1.
1. 1 Peter 5:8- Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil walks about seeking whom he may devour. The enemy wants to destroy your marriage and he will use anyone and any situation to do it. The number one way he will try is with your mind because your mind is the battlefield. If he can get you to focus on anything negative he can get you to doubt yourself, your spouse and your marriage and destroy your peace. How can you keep your peace? See #2.
2. Isaiah 26:3-You will keep in perfect peace those whose mind is stayed on You, because he trusts in You. No matter what is happening in your marriage, keep trusting God. Don’t look to the left, don’t look to the right; keep looking to God. In other words, don’t look at someone else’s marriage for comparison and don’t look for comfort in another man/woman; stay in the Word. Do your part in the marriage, trust God to handle the rest and control your thoughts. How can you control your thoughts? See #3.
3. II Corinthians 10:5- Casting down arguments and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God, bringing every thought into the captivity to the obedience of Christ. Be mindful of what you meditate on. What you meditate on affects your feelings which will affect your actions. Examine your thoughts. If they are negative and do not line up with the Word, get rid of them immediately. Start thinking on something else. What is it you should think about? See #4.
4. Philippians 4:8- Finally, brothers, and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable-if anything is excellent or praiseworthy-think about such things. What are you thinking about regarding your marriage? Do you think your spouse is cheating when there is no evidence? Do you think your spouse is unhappy in the relationship? Do you think he/she is going to leave you? Instead of dwelling on things that are not good, think on positive things only.
Think on what is good, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable and excellent about yourself, your spouse and your marriage. Surely you can find something worthy to be praised about yourself and your spouse. If you have negative thoughts about your marriage and dwell on them long enough, you will find yourself speaking negatively about your marriage. If you don’t guard your mouth, you will have what you say. What will happen if you don’t guard your mouth? See #5.
5. Proverbs 13:3 – He who guards his mouth preserves his life, but he who opens wide his lips shall have destruction. So be careful with your words; you can wreck your relationship with what you say. Only speak good things about your relationship no matter what state it is in.
Negative words won’t make it better, but the more positive words you hear, the more it will encourage you to fight for the relationship. Be mindful of your words during disagreements. Some things are better left unsaid, so please think before you speak. A million apologies can never erase hurtful words. Speak only good things.
I want to leave you with this. No matter what your beliefs, your thoughts, good or bad, will determine what you feel which will determine what your actions and speech will be in any situation. You have to choose what you want to think on. Even if your situation isn’t good, know that it won’t always be like that. Speaking negatively will not help and certainly won’t make you feel better. Guard your thoughts, your actions and your words.
BMWK family which scriptures have helped your marriage?