I am a bit of a pack rat. I hate to admit it because I know it’s not the best habit, but it is what it is. I hold on to things I don’t need for way too long. I let random things linger around the home when they serve no real purpose. And worst of all, I love to act like I really need and want something—like it’s still useful—when I know that it’s just not.

But with some hard work and mindfulness, my bad habit has improved over the years. Truthfully, I have to give my husband a lot of credit for that. I now throw things out or donate them with a lot more ease. I try to go through the mail before the pile gets outrageous. And I do my best to get rid of the old and useless in order to make way for things that will improve the look of our home and the quality of our lives. I’ve made some serious progress.

With spring on the horizon, many of use are thinking about how to declutter our spaces. We are all looking through our closets, trying to decide if we should finally giveaway those outfits that haven’t fit since before our kid was born seven years ago. Many of us are assessing our pile of books, wondering if they are all really favorites with sentimental value. And we are even examining our home décor, trying to decide if we have a budget for a complete makeover or just a “facelift.” Indeed, spring makes us want to clear out the old and get ready for the new.

But the truth is, it’s rarely just our homes that need to be decluttered. Often times our marriages could use some spring cleaning far more than our homes can. Are you still bitter about something your spouse did 6 months ago? Are you still angry about a promise your spouse made two years ago but never kept? Are you holding on to every mistake you made in your relationship, telling yourself that you don’t deserve the person you’re with?

Holding on to what doesn’t serve you, whether it’s something in your home or in your marriage, is never a good thing. Just like things, useless emotions have a way of just draining us and taking up space—space that could be used to house emotions that are healthier and serve a much greater purpose.

As you enter this new season, don’t just think about how you can declutter your home, office or any other space you spend a lot of time in. Take a moment to also think about how you should declutter your marriage. Ask yourself the following questions:

Am I angry with my spouse about something?

Am I holding on to any resentment?

Are there unresolved issues in my marriage that I am avoiding?

Do I throw old issues at my spouse during arguments?

Am I keeping secrets from my spouse?

Do unhealthy patterns keeping repeating in my relationship?

If you answered yes to any of these questions maybe it’s time to focus your spring cleaning efforts on your marriage and begin the declutter process there. It won’t be easy, and you may have a lot of work ahead. Decluttering is not always as easy as throwing some stuff out. Decluttering is about identifying why you held on to the stuff in the first place. Decluttering is about realizing that the stuff never really served you. And most importantly, it’s about figuring out what needs to happen so that clutter doesn’t find its way into your life again.

As much as I actually appreciate the Winter months, I am eager for Spring to arrive and I know I am not the only one. I am getting ready to declutter my home office, my bedroom, and my marriage. Remember, decluttering is an opportunity to make room in your life for what is beautiful and meaningful. After all, can’t we all benefit from having some more space to just enjoy life and the people we share it with.

BMWK family, what can you do to declutter your marriage this spring?