Have you ever second guessed a decision you made as a parent? For example, sent your child out with a light jacket on a chilly day because you forgot to check the weather? Or lost track of your children in a mall? Or have you ever been so drained after work you barely checked your child’s homework and sent him/her on their way anyway? Well, I have. And as a result I still occasionally judge myself as a mom.
There’s no other way to say it other than, parenting is damn hard. No two days are the same. There are those moments you want to pull your hair out and those other occasions you thank God for blessing you with such a responsibility. Not sure about dads, but as a mom we worry about everything.
We are concerned about their health, grades and about the adults our children will become. If either of those areas suffer, we blame ourselves. It’s easy to recognize our parenting flaws, but rarely do we give ourselves the credit we deserve. Questioning who we are as parents is normal, but if you find yourself being extra hard on yourself, stop it. It’s time you appreciate your parenting skills. Here’s a few tips to help you overcome your parenting insecurities.
Trust your instinct. If it doesn’t feel right, it’s usually not. You know what’s best for your children. It’s not always best to make the popular decision, but it’s smart to go with the one that makes the most sense and fits into your parenting plan.
Examine your track record. Look at the positive outcomes of decisions past and recognize that you do make great decisions.
Acknowledge why God blessed you with a child. Whether you’re the biological, adopted, foster or step-parent, you were selected for a purpose. That purpose is because you have what it takes to be successful. God trusts you, yes you.
Talk to those wiser, more seasoned parents to get advice on how they handled the pressure and follow their lead.
Pray over your household, children and your parenting technique. Then listen for the guidance God will reveal.
We all are pretty much winging it as parents. We use our upbringing as a guide, but for the most part, many of us are doing our best. The truth is there will be doubt as we set out to raise our children. But I challenge each of you to love yourself as a parent and trust that “you got this”.
BMWK, how do you handle those moments of self-doubt as a parent?
Adanna says
I struggle with this at times. Kids don’t come with manuals so I’m
Sometimes second or third guessing myself. I usually pray if
I’m really worried or unsettled.
Tiya says
Yes, Adanna! Same here.