by Tara Pringle Jefferson
Let me start with a bit of a story: This past weekend, my husband spent most of the day painting our bedroom. We moved in two years ago and picked the house because it was move-in ready. But the neutral brown color of our bedroom made me feel like I was sleeping in a cave and I hated it. But life happens and I was busy and didn’t want to paint while the kids were home so it never got done.
So my husband decided to tackle the job for me. First he cleaned up the bedroom. Then he moved all the furniture by himself. Then he painted, and vacuumed. What a great husband, right?
While he was doing all this, I was downstairs wrangling the kids, making dinner, trying to clean the house and wash clothes. I came upstairs and was thrilled at what he had done. I hugged and kissed him and told him to come downstairs for dinner. In my mind, I had thanked him for a job well done.
Later that night he asked for a massage. I was tired and don’t like to give half-hearted massages, so I told him I’d give him one the next night.
Errr…really? Is that how I’m living these days? My husband moves our dresser, bed, closet doors, side tables, etc, by himself, and was probably a little sore, or maybe just wanted a massage to help him fall asleep.
Every day, I’m trying to show my husband that I love him, that I appreciate him being in my life and that what he brings to the table complements me in the most organic way. But even with my best efforts, I fall short.
I wholeheartedly believe our marriages would be a lot better if we had the objectivity to check ourselves when we know we’re in the wrong. AND then we’d be even better off if we chose to do something about it.
The next time your spouse does something wonderful for you – don’t take it for granted. Even if your spouse does that “little special something” all the time and thinks nothing of it, make sure they know how much you appreciate it. Shower them with praise. Return the favor if you can. Make a mental note of this kind gesture to temper your anger the next time they piss you off. (lol)
Tara Pringle Jefferson is managing editor of BlackAndMarriedWithKids.com. She’s also the author of Make It Happen: The Young Mommy Guide To Creating The Career You Crave. Follow her on Twitter or check out her blog for her insights on what it means to be a mom, wife, student, writer, and about three other labels she’s too tired to remember.
Tara, great recognition. And appreciation must be something that becomes catagious in your marriage.
http://www.ruleyourwife316.com
Great article Tara, I think we all in a marriage fall short in the appreciation department from time to time. The everyday grind has most of us thinking about other immediate tasks. It’s good to show your spouse that you appreciate them from the meals they cook to the bigger task that they take on. As Reginald said it’s something that should be contagious in a marriage and in the long run appreciation piece will just be another accomplishment in stabilizing a successful marriage.
I like this post very much because given line is correct. When someone do best thing then appreciate to boy. This appreciation will built confidence and he will try to do more best and he became genius.
I like this post very much because given line is correct. When someone do best thing then appreciate to boy. This appreciation will built confidence and he will try to do more best and he became genius.
I like this post very much because given line is correct. When someone do best thing then appreciate to boy. This appreciation will built confidence and he will try to do more best and he became genius.