Tonight, I’m writing this from our AirBNB rental in Denver, Colorado. My wife and I have been wanting to hit this city for a while now, and after tonight, we can cross it off our life’s to-do list. This weekend is going to be a blast. And we may not have gotten here if it wasn’t for our vision board we use to guide our minor and major marriage decisions.
By now, you’ve heard about these vision boards. Most of them look like some version of your kid’s after school project replete with Elmer’s glue and a living room full of discarded magazine clippings. You may have even come across a vision board workshop invite on your Facebook feed. They’re everywhere because they’re talking to you. And it’s saying:
You need a vision for your life.
Yes, you need a vision for your life.
Life is designed to beat you into a routine of submissive mindlessness. This skill is vey helpful for keeping the mortgage and rent paid, but does very little to stir the soul.
You married your spouse because they stirred your soul. Creating that vision two of you can share glimpses of the future the both of you are working so for. These images are for you and your marriage. No two will ever be alike. Most can never be wrong – as along as they’re created together.
My wife and I have a digital Pinterest board. It’s something modern we can both add to, share, send, and keep on our smartphones in front of us to see whenever we need to. We look at phones so much these days, we all might at as well be paying attention to something worthwhile. A digital board also allows us to access the wide and wonderful internet, so we can add to with a few clicks and swipes.
New mountain town in in the Rockies? Click – Swipe.
New interesting architect on the scene focused on 0 carbon homes for the masses? Click – Swipe.
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Take a look at your own search history. What are you looking up everyday? What questions are you asking? Who’s stories are your reading? What inputs are you accepting? What does Google know about you? Then ask yourself this:
If you had to make a sharable. vision board using only your browser history as images you could use, would you be proud to share it?
If the answer is yes, then congratulations, you just need to share more with your spouse. Speak up and speak life into your future. Rally around shared goals, rather than spite or some false sense of obligation. Get it done, you’re in the fast lane. Pull The Trigger.
If the answer is no, then you need to rethink about what you’re regularly allowing yourself to take in from the world around you. Every single marriage starts with the self. It’s your responsibility to bring your self into the marriage. It’s the perfect time as we all move into the new year.
You can go old school vision board, adding clippings that still speak to your sense of wonder. Could you be so daring to share what that looks like with the person who shares your bed every night? As long as your vision for you life remains hidden, no one can help you mine the right pieces you need to build with. The cliché is there for a reason – it all comes down to communication and a willingness to understand.
On top of that foundation of communication and understanding runs the machine who’s job it is to focus the family’s energy into something worthwhile. Most of us are simply working individuals who’s goal is to have a secure, impactful, kind, nurtured, fed and safe family whose kids have a shot a better tomorrow.
Because we’re lucky we can do so.
Because our ultimate modern American privilege is that it’s possible if we want it.
But it has to start with a vision.
BMWK, What are you and your spouse working on?