Yes, yes, yes! How many times do you feel like going off on your spouse?
Do you ever find yourself asking Jesus for help restraining your tongue after your spouse does something to make your blood rise?
In these situations, are you tempted to say some things—things that are not always nice?
When you get to that moment, and you will have those moments, remember these scriptures to help you avoid going off on your spouse.
- Proverbs 15:1 A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.
When your spouse asks what you think is a dumb question, instead of responding in a sarcastic or mean way, pause and give the best answer you have. A soft answer will allow you to avoid an unnecessary argument.
- James 1:19 So then, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath.
If you feel an argument on the horizon during a conversation with your spouse, listen to what your spouse is saying and think before you speak. Recall the first scripture and respond with a “soft” answer if you can. If the argument continues to grow, try your best not to become angry. Unchecked anger can and will cause more harm in your relationship so be careful.
- Proverbs 12:18 There is one who speaks like the piercings of a sword, but the tongue of the wise promotes health.
Don’t be that one that cuts their spouse with words. I know that I have been guilty of it. Be the one who uses words to build up and encourage your wife or husband. By doing this, you can avoid all kinds of trouble.
- Proverbs 18:21 Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it, will eat its fruit. You can kill your marriage or sustain your marriage with what comes out of your mouth. If you are the type who just has to say something—you know, the one who loves to hear him- or herself talk, you will have to deal with the consequences of what you say, good or bad.
- Psalms 39:1 I will guard my ways, lest I sin with my tongue; I will restrain my mouth with a muzzle, while the wicked are before me. This scripture will help you before, during and after an argument. Just keep thinking to yourself that you will watch what you do so you won’t say something bad that you can’t take back. Even if you have to put your hand over your mouth or tighten your lips while you are eyeing your spouse, knowing you are about to go straight off! And no, please don’t tell your spouse they are wicked. LOL. Just remember that you can save yourself a whole lot of trouble if you just remain silent, say something less harsh or just walk away.
These scriptures may not come to mind while you are in an argument, but refer back to them afterward so you can avoid saying things that will escalate into another argument in the future.
You must remember that marriage is a union of two people with two different personalities and views. Living together and making decisions together are not always going to be easy but controlling your tongue will make your married life more peaceful and enjoyable.
No amount of apologies can ever take back the harsh words you speak.
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BMWK family, how do you avoid going off on your spouse?