Earlier this week I heard a radio interview with a local Matchmaker who believes that single black women should open their mindsets to dating outside of their norm. The alternative dating options she’s referring to is dating bisexual men or men who have had relationships with same sex partners, but realize they prefer women instead.
She felt that women would be able to expand their dating odds and find love and potentially marriage. She stated that “Just because someone had an experience with the same sex partner, they shouldn’t be automatically written off. Women should take the time to have a conversation with a potential partner to determine if he is still in that lifestyle before making a decision to walk away.”
Many listening to the interview, including myself, were taken aback by this thought process. The male radio personality was just as skeptical as most women. During the interview, he admitted that this was his first time hearing this “idea” on a mainstream platform.
I had to agree; but then this weekend, I saw the Lifetime movie Love by the 10th Date, where a storyline was dedicated to this very concept. In the movie, the female character was falling in love with the bisexual man she was dating, but was skeptical if she would be able to satisfy him. In her mind, she wasn’t sure if her love would be enough. She worried that he would eventually leave her for a man.
Is this what dating has come to for single black women?
When I talked to most single women regarding this idea, their immediate reaction is N.O.! However, there are some women who are open to this concept.
As with any relationship, I think that the individuals involved need to examine their motives and a few questions need to be asked: Ladies, are you dating a man in this category out of loneliness or are you really willing to get to know the person? Men, are you dating women as an experiment or is this your heart’s desire?
As I listened to this interview and watched the storyline, I kept thinking; people need to be honest and true to themselves. I would venture to say those who are open to this idea are already pursing this option. And for those considering this choice, it’s imperative that they aren’t motivated by loneliness but by their beliefs and true desires. Before pursuing something outside of their norm, individuals need to be sure this is what they really want; in an effort to avoid hurting others and themselves.
Is this the new dating pool for black women? It seems as if Hollywood is leaning that way.
BMWK, What do you think?