I’ve had too many conversations with individuals who have a spouse or mate who’sjealous of them. Whether it’s their life, drive, opportunities and/or accolades, instead of receiving joy, praise or encouragement from their mates, they experience drama from the one they love.
Don’t think it’s possible?
Here are five signs that you or your significant other may be jealous:
You are happy for your mate’s accomplishment but internally you are asking “I deserve praise too.” And many other thoughts begin to flow through your mind. Instead of celebrating them, you start thinking of ways you can succeed too.
You become so preoccupied with your success plan that you forget to give the desired encouragement and adulation to your mate.
But what about….
When your significant other shares their good news, instead of congratulating them you begin to ask about the things they haven’t accomplished. You focus on their unfinished projects rather than their accomplishments.
Rather than celebrate your mate’s accomplishments, you pick apart how they achieved their goals. You begin to question their methodology. Your actions instill doubt rather than joy and pride.
It’s all about YOU
Due to your own insecurity, you begin to tout your successes and accomplishments in an effort to make others see your value and worth. You forget about celebrating others because you need to celebrate and uplift yourself. While your mate is in utter joy over their accomplishments, you begin to overshadow them with self-promotion.
Your significant other has achieved a major victory. But, instead of congratulating them, you begin to compare their victory to others. Belittling or minimizing their accomplishments and forcing them to try and measure up to someone else.
Jealousy is one of those emotions, that can sneak up on you and by the time you realize it, it’s already in full motion. Be it subtle or blatant, your jealousy stems from your own insecurities, fears and/or perceived loss of value and worth.
And for some people, someone else’s success can cause someone to doubt their significance in that relationship. In order to overcome jealous tendencies, choose to be more self-aware.
When feelings of insecurity or fear arise, ask yourself what are these feelings stemming from? Why do I feel this way? As you begin to ascertain your emotions, learn from them and find ways to overcome your negative feelings. As you focus on the positive and not your perceived negativity, you will become more confident and self-assured in your relationships and in life.
BMWK, is jealousy ruining your relationships?