by Dr. Charles Alonzo Peters
Despite not having a lot of money, my parents would give their last dime to help those in need. Perhaps that’s why I grew up having no problems giving money to panhandlers.
Things changed, however, when I moved to Philadelphia for graduate school. Panhandlers were everywhere. Despite money being tight and having to subsist on Ramen noodles and ham sandwiches, I still tried to give whatever I could. That is, until the day I noticed a homeless man soliciting money for something to eat.
I was starving at the time, had no money on me, and wouldn’t be able to eat again until I got home later that evening. But I figured he needed my ham sandwich, cookies, and banana more than I did, so I handed him my bagged lunch from home.
As I walked away, you can imagine how upset I was when I turned my head to see him peer into the bag and then toss it into the nearest trash can. He then proceeded asking strangers for money to “get something to eat.”
Just months later, I came across another panhandler. This one was a university fixture, one of the “friendly” panhandlers who always flashed a smile and offered a compliment. Everyone knew him by name, and I’d always given him a dollar or two when I had it. As I turned the corner I unexpectedly caught him counting his money.
This man had a money roll thick with twenties, what seemed like a couple hundred dollars. In his hand was more money than I’d seen in months. When he noticed me, he flashed a faint smile before jumping into a waiting car.
You can imagine that these experiences left me a little jaded.
Nowadays, I’m often conflicted between my Christian sensibilities and real world skepticism. “I say unto you, in as ye have done unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done unto me,” clashes with “that grown behind able-bodied man has some nerve sitting there begging for money.”
Often the conflict produces a schizophrenic reaction. I’ll give a dollar one day, while completely ignoring panhandlers the next.
So how about you?
BMWK. How do you feel about giving money to panhandlers? Do Christian, Islamic or other religious values implore you to give regardless of what someone might do with your money? Does your view change if it’s a woman or child doing the panhandling?
Gods_Man says
I do not give money to pan handlers. I have no problem taking someone to the grocery/food store and buying what they need. I also carry and extra sandwich and water in my lunch everyday. As a church we will pay bills directly to landlords and utility companies
To piggy back on your stories there was a student from my college who used to stand out near our apartments and panhandle. He would “make” a few hundred dollars every month and party with it.
Gods_Man says
I do not give money to pan handlers. I have no problem taking someone to the grocery/food store and buying what they need. I also carry and extra sandwich and water in my lunch everyday. As a church we will pay bills directly to landlords and utility companies
To piggy back on your stories there was a student from my college who used to stand out near our apartments and panhandle. He would “make” a few hundred dollars every month and party with it.
Jcablood4me says
I used to give, but then I read once in the local paper how one man was making almost a 1,000.00 a week doing it. Like the brother in the previous post I prefer now to just go ahead and buy them something instead of just giving out cash.
GiverGirl says
I will usually buy someone food, but I rarely give money. I’ve even gone home and cooked for a homeless person and brought them back food when I was too broke to buy them something. Occassionally, I am moved to hand out some cash, but I don’t let those exploiting the system deter me from giving. I am giving in the right spirit. If they are taking in the wrong spirit, I imagine that it will catch up with them one way or another.
I also rarely carry cash, so this keeps me from doling out money left and right.
Lisa says
I don’t give to panhandlers. I will donate to a shelter that feeds the homeless and provides them with transitional skills.
As a woman, I also don’t feel comfortable handing money over to able-bodied men. I grew up believing that men were supposed to get out and work. If money alone is the issue, there’s someone willing to pay somebody to do some manual labor, but I don’t believe the panhandlers are truly looking for honest work.
AKP says
If I have it I will generally give it. I usually don’t carry cash though.
I live in the DC area and one thing that is common here is folks standing at traffic lights or outside stores claiming to be collecting money for a church organization or some kind of youth organization holding a bucket and wearing a cross. Under no circumstance do I give money to these individuals! I don’t like to be lied to about what you want/need the money for. My thing is if you are hungry or in need, there is no shame in that, but don’t lie to me about collecting money for some none existent organization. That is some shameful nonsense.
TheMrs says
AKP, my children are on a drill team(we’ve been with them for almost 10 yrs) and what you described is one of the ways that we fundraise for our trips and competitions. The buses for a day trip run several hundreds of dollars and overnight trips can run in the thousands. Not to mention the cost of uniforms and drum equipment, 1 pair of bass drum sticks is $50!!! When organizations are fundraising look for an adult to be standing with the children as well as ask them what it is for, if it is legit they will be able to answer you with no problem unless they are amongst the younger members. Please don’t totally discount the organizations!!!
akp says
I hear what you are saying, but in light of the fact that so many of us have been duped by these so called “organizations”, I think it is a poor way to raise money for a group. Fudraising should involve a product being offered in exchange for money, not begging folks for money so you can go somewhere. Sale some candy, cookies or donuts. But to ask me for money in exchange for nothing amounts to panhandling, sorry. No way I would allow my kids to do that. If they are trying to get somewhere for some type of youth league, then the adults need to find an actual fundraiser for them to participate in, not have them blocking traffic and competing with the homeless man standing next to them.
TheMrs says
We’ve done the candy before (25 cents for every $1 bar sold), we’ve done the coupon books(this we get half of the $25 a book fee but much harder to sell), car washes, etc. Now my group actually performs where we are and people stop and give donations because they can see what we are doing. We don’t stand in the middle of traffic to do so. There is no real sponsorship available for what our group does despite the fact that we keep large numbers of children off of the streets with something constructive, teach leadership skills, and for our drummers they actually learn how to play an instrument. Unfortunately the costs that we incur are way more than what a candy sale will bring in…bass drum sticks ($50), bass drum heads($100 ea), bass harness($35), and their uniform($150). We replace sticks and heads every couple of months, we would need to sell 200 candy bars in order to buy one pair of sticks and we have 4 bass players. Our final competition for the season is a 3 day trip with the bus alone costing roughly $5,000 along with the cost of hotel rooms and we also have to pay for the room for the bus driver…this would cost each member about $200 not to mention that several of our members are from 1 family who can’t afford to send all 3 kids..
TheMrs says
We’ve done the candy before (25 cents for every $1 bar sold), we’ve done the coupon books(this we get half of the $25 a book fee but much harder to sell), car washes, etc. Now my group actually performs where we are and people stop and give donations because they can see what we are doing. We don’t stand in the middle of traffic to do so. There is no real sponsorship available for what our group does despite the fact that we keep large numbers of children off of the streets with something constructive, teach leadership skills, and for our drummers they actually learn how to play an instrument. Unfortunately the costs that we incur are way more than what a candy sale will bring in…bass drum sticks ($50), bass drum heads($100 ea), bass harness($35), and their uniform($150). We replace sticks and heads every couple of months, we would need to sell 200 candy bars in order to buy one pair of sticks and we have 4 bass players. Our final competition for the season is a 3 day trip with the bus alone costing roughly $5,000 along with the cost of hotel rooms and we also have to pay for the room for the bus driver…this would cost each member about $200 not to mention that several of our members are from 1 family who can’t afford to send all 3 kids..
TheMrs says
AKP, my children are on a drill team(we’ve been with them for almost 10 yrs) and what you described is one of the ways that we fundraise for our trips and competitions. The buses for a day trip run several hundreds of dollars and overnight trips can run in the thousands. Not to mention the cost of uniforms and drum equipment, 1 pair of bass drum sticks is $50!!! When organizations are fundraising look for an adult to be standing with the children as well as ask them what it is for, if it is legit they will be able to answer you with no problem unless they are amongst the younger members. Please don’t totally discount the organizations!!!
Martha says
It’s sad when people do such things because it really make honesty hardworking people like myself that don’t always have money to take care of what I really need to take care of and here we have people that rather get out on the street corners asking others for money when they can be somewhere looking for work. Trust me I understand things do happen to people but that shouldn’t stop a person from trying too find jobs. I also, shouldn’t want too cause you as a person too want to take someone elses hard earned money for your own selfish needs. That is dead wrong, one thing about it though GOD see’s and know’s it all, so that’s one person you can’t hide from.
Discussion King says
What a way to ruin our happy Monday mood. 🙂
I’ve given cash before… can’t say I’ll never do it again. I think most of us are pretty desensitized to it all living in and near cities where there are many asking for funds. You just realized that you can’t help everyone. We all have our limits anyway, or we’d be giving our entire checks to those asking or to the organizations supporting the less fortunate.
I wont, for a second, let some who have tainted the process keep me for helping others… I think it’s good that we all find out how we’d like to assist… whether it’s cooking a meal, buying a meal, givng cash, or even a word of encouragement.
And name some places where you can be homeless.. LOOK homeless, and be hired for a job. Go ahead.. I’ll wait.
Larrylewis68 says
I donate to shelters, but I do not give out money..change, coupons, buttons or otherwise..to seemingly healthy men. A woman in a wheel chair or something like that ..yeah sure…10 bucks or so..something.
But I refuse to give money to a grown behind man..esp. European men..simply because they’ve got a leg up on most simply because of the color of their skin. Their condition has a greater chance of taking a turn for the positive if they simply clean up their act…Whereas most African Americans/Latinos face greater obstacles in trying to correct their condition..
Reggie Williams says
I am led by the spirit of the moment. If my spirit says yes and I have, I give. In contrast, if my spirit say no, I don’t.
To be quite honest I could care less what they do with the money. Don’t care if they have $1,000 in their pocket and I’m trying to make it to the next pay day. When I give from my spirit I am planting a plentiful seed that will harvest in my life at some point in the future. God will take care of me because I gave willingly and then God will take care of him because he took under false pretenses. I do what I’m suppose to and let God take care of what he takes care of.
One other thing: even in giving money to an abled body man — what if the couple of dollars I gave that lazy, abled body man was just enough money to keep him from robbing the next vulnerable woman? In my giving, I didn’t even know that God used me to bless someone else. Folks I just ain’t going to rob my blessings by being a legislature over someone else’s poor behavior. But that’s just me.
http://www.ruleyourwife316.com.
Aja says
I typically do not give to any panhandlers, abled-bodied, disabled, people with sad signs- no one. My decision has less to do with whether I think they’re scamming me and more to do with the fact that if you are truly in need there are better ways to go about getting the help you need than standing outside asking for money. You’ll notice that you usually see the same panhandlers all the time. Whether they’re going to use the money for good or bad, I don’t feel like my dollar is going to make as big of an impact in helping them truly get ahead as if I donate that money to a charity every month, soup kitchen, food bank etc. which I do. On the other hand if I give out a dollar today, that same person will be there asking for a dollar tomorrow.
TheMrs says
I do not give to the common panhandler on the street, only organizations. I can not tell you how upsetting it is to be walking down the street with my 5 children and have a man asking me to give him some money to help him out!!! I also live in Philadelphia and have plenty of stories of the “regular” panhandler on post at a location. There is a woman on the 52nd street business corrider who complements you and your children and your dog as she asks you to make a donation and she gives you a flower. Despite all she does, I can’t give to her or anyone else. I think I am also desensitized from working in drug and alcohol rehab and seeing many of my clients doing this, I can’t buy your next beer or hit….
TheMrs says
I do not give to the common panhandler on the street, only organizations. I can not tell you how upsetting it is to be walking down the street with my 5 children and have a man asking me to give him some money to help him out!!! I also live in Philadelphia and have plenty of stories of the “regular” panhandler on post at a location. There is a woman on the 52nd street business corrider who complements you and your children and your dog as she asks you to make a donation and she gives you a flower. Despite all she does, I can’t give to her or anyone else. I think I am also desensitized from working in drug and alcohol rehab and seeing many of my clients doing this, I can’t buy your next beer or hit….
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