This is part of a sponsored campaign with McDonald’s®. All opinions are my own.
As a wife, mom of 4, and busy entrepreneur, I am constantly being asked the questions: “How do you find balance?” or “How do you balance working, taking care of the kids, and ensuring that your marriage is thriving?” And if I am totally honest with you. I really don’t like those questions.
My first thought is that you are assuming that it’s all balanced because of your external perception of me. And I can see how that happens. If I’m doing an interview, it’s probably because you want to highlight one of my accomplishments. And since my mother taught me right, I’m probably looking super cute…all put together and what not. But, if you saw me two nights before when I was dog-tired from working 14 hours that day, and when I rolled into my house later than normal from a long day of work and the kids were not only hungry but irritable and taking it out on each other, and when I had no idea what to cook for dinner, nor the energy to cook it, then would you ask me that same question?
Here’s how I find balance on a day like that. I don’t cook dinner! The kids and I jump in the car and head over to McDonald’s and we enjoy a nice affordable meal. In addition to their all-time favorites, chicken nuggets and cheeseburgers, I am happy that my kids are also loving the apple slices, Cuties or Yoplait Go-GURT Low Fat Strawberry Yogurt that McDonald’s now offers. And more importantly, we enjoy each other for the couple of hours that I have to spend with them before bedtime.
So here are 3 tips on how this busy mom finds balance:
- Realize that balance does not mean equal. I had to come to a realization that everything is not going to be equal between my kids, my marriage and my career. Sometimes, I may have to focus more on one area than the others. And that’s ok.
- Ensure your family has routines. Establishing routines for my family helps things run smoothly, especially in those times when I am busy with our business or we need a couples-only getaway. So the kids will already know that when they get home from school, they should get a snack and do their homework (before the TV can come on.) And things are getting done, even when I am not there to initiate them. Routines cut-down on the chaos! Repeat that with me: Routines cut-down on the chaos!
- Know when to ask for help. Trying to do things all alone is the quickest way to find myself “off-balance.” The best part of being married is that you have someone to partner with. And the best part of having 4 kids, all of them over the age of 7, is that they also can help! Yes…lawd!
So there you have it. This busy mom finds balance by realizing that balance doesn’t really exist. And that’s OK. As long as you are focusing on the moments that matter, your family will be happy. And that is what no-one will tell you.
BMWK Family – what’s your secret to finding balance?
Disclosure: Thank you to McDonald’s® for sponsoring this post and for always being there over the years when I’ve needed to focus on what really matters. All opinions are my own.
Bernetta K. says
Finding balance is could be possible, but it depends on how much do you have actually have to do. I will say my spouse helps me find some sort of balance (if that is even possible). If he didn’t support me, I couldn’t do have half of the things I do. Close to none. Balance is also about prioritizing as well. When you know what’s important it’s easier to get things done though out the day.
Ronnie Tyler says
Thanks for the comment Bernetta…. like you..my husband is very instrumental in supporting me…that is how I even get close to what you would call “balance”
T. Espinoza says
You read my mind! Before I even got to this part “Realize that balance does not mean equal.” it’s exactly what I was thinking. Everything won’t be perfectly balanced at the same time every time and that’s okay. I just try to set myself up for more good days than stressful ones 🙂
Ronnie Tyler says
me too T.!
Lately Ive found that short naps give me the balance that I need to handle things. Also learning what works best for me. I am much more productive late nights then I am in the daytime. So i changed my schedule. After evening family time, I stay up and work. Get up early to get everyone off to work and school. Take a nap, then start MY day. So far so good. The key then is finding what works best for you and the family. Great post.
Ronnie Tyler says
Great advice!!! I think setting a schedule what works for you is great advice.
Christine St. Vil says
Yes, yes and YES some more!!! I cringe every time I hear someone ask how to find balance. It definitely does not exist. I look at it as a juggling act. When you’re juggling, all the items are in rotation, never in the air or in your hands at the same time. It’s the same thing when it comes to creating the life you want. I’m sharing this one all over the place! LOL Oh and Routines cut-down on the chaos! Amen!! 😉
Ronnie Tyler says
Thanks for commenting and sharing Christine!
I love love love this article, I am a single mom of 4 kiddos, active duty full time. So I learned to do this like a boss, my house does stay messy sometimes, I do fast food, and leave the dishes for the early mornings. There is no balance but you find it somewhere or some how and everything still get done. I would not change it for the world, I miss the noise and madnesses when their gone.