Do you believe in soul mates? I do. I always have. I’m not sure why because I definitely didn’t grow up feeling like my parents were soul mates, and I can’t remember seeing many healthy relationships when I was younger. But something in me has always believed that the idea of a soul mate has to be something real.
I have never wavered from that belief. And although I have seen many people hurt in relationships that they thought would last a lifetime, I don’t think it has anything to do with whether or not soul mates are real. I think it has more to do with whether or not people are choosing the right partners.
Do you just get one soul mate?
So does this whole notion of a soul mate mean you just get one? Is there one person out there that God designed just for you—the person you are meant to be with until you return home to your maker? Believe it or not, the romantic in me actually doesn’t believe that. The practical side of my brain won’t allow it.
Having just one soul mate would mean that God only created one person on earth that you can connect with on a deep spiritual level. But if that were true, what happens if someone’s spouse passes away?
Surely God’s intentions are not for this person to go without a soul mate for the rest of their time here on earth. There has to be someone else you connect with on that deep level, right? I believe so, because my husband isn’t my only soul mate.
Can your relationship last if you didn’t marry your soul mate?
I have always had a special bond with my best friend. By my side for over 25 years, this woman is, without question, one of my soul mates. But I believe my husband is my soul mate as well. There is no competition between the two of them at all. Each relationship is very different and special in it’s own right. My hope is that they both last forever.
So what if you get married but the person you marry isn’t your soul mate—will things last? It truly depends on what you and your spouse believe. Some people don’t even believe in soul mates, and if that works for you and your relationship, then that’s great.
And some people believe that you can have several soul mates and it doesn’t always have to be someone you’re romantically involved with. Clearly I agree with the latter.
From my personal perspective, I think marrying your soul mate would be nice, but I also believe that marrying a person you love, respect, and can grow with is truly what’s important. If you are happily married, that means you married one of the people God crafted for you. In my book that’s pretty good stuff.
What if I married my soul mate and it’s not working out?
If you married someone and you truly believe that person is your soul mate but things just didn’t work out, don’t be discouraged. I don’t think marrying your soul mate is a guarantee that things will work out. There are no guarantees, and no matter how deeply someone touches your life, that person is human and human beings are flawed.
Some people even argue that your soul mate can be someone who was sent to change your life in a profound way and not necessarily be in it forever. Sometimes the most transformative and meaningful experiences in our lives don’t last, but we needed to have them because those experiences bring us closer to the person we are meant to be.
Will I be complete if I never find my soul mate?
You will undoubtedly be complete without marrying your soul mate, because you don’t need another person to complete you, soul mate or otherwise. Your spouse is there to add value to your life and share an incredible journey with you. For that relationship to last, you need to be complete when that person enters your life.
Finding your soul mate is not about finding someone who completes you. When you are looking for someone to complete you, what you are really looking for is yourself. Soul mates enhance our lives and add meaning.
They understand us and change us in profound ways. If you pay attention to that instead of this Jerry McGuire feeling of being completed, you may realize that you’ve met one of your soul mates already. Sometimes what we need is right before us if we train our eyes to see it.
BMWK family, what are your thoughts on soul mates?