1. Where do I need to grow spiritually? None of us gets to a point of not needing to grow in our relationship with God. Ask yourself honestly, where do you need to grow in your understanding of God?
2. What needs to change about ME? In what ways does your perspective, attitude or approach need to change. At this point it doesn’t even matter what your spouse does or does not do, this is your time of change or self-improvement. Ask tough questions and let God give you tough answers.
3. How can I pray for my spouse? The hurt is real. But this is not about him or her. To be able to grow, start praying for your spouse. Our prayer is not for the things we see or know to be wrong about them. Rather, we pray for their peace, for their growth, for God to show them His plan for their life. Just pray for them and watch how God grows you.
4. Where do I see God at work in this? Remember what Grandma said, “What doesn’t kill you, will make you stronger”. It is easy to get excited about the things God does that make us smile and feel good. But, the tough stuff that He allows us to survive is for our good too! So, take a look, where do you see God’s hand in your life?
BMWK, are these principles you can put into action?
Thank you
Awesome words of wisdom! This happened to me twice & both times it wasn’t until we had children together?
Thank you for this article I’m going through this right now. It’s not easy. I’ll take as much feed back as I can.
I’m going thru the same thing, and its not easy. Idk how my marriage will survive. I’m praying. How can it survive?? Is this to make us stronger. Idk
Glad it was right on time for you. Stay positive!
Glad you found a way to endure – twice.
I don’t know what to do. My current situation is traveling on “uneven paths” with my 21 yr marriage and 3 months into my job.
2014 marks 7 years divorced for me too. With what I was left to overcome from then to now, it was definitely the God in me and the strength He gave me to release, rejoice and rebuild – by keeping Him first! When I had to close my eyes more than I kept them open from the hurt, God guided my every step. Even though my ex checked out in the marriage, God was still there to check in with through every season as my life was changing. A lesson I reflect back on and share with others. I pray that every marriage situation leaves you empowered to STILL STAND STRONG!!!
I’m currently going through this situation. My husband left June 2014 and it has truly been rough.
I don’t what to do, I feel lost. I lost my dad and than my husband walked out within months and we are still married, Why do i feel the need to hold on? We been married for 13 years and now he’s with a white woman and he say her mouth nothing like yours have no children so i feel alone scared i stay in the house because of what people will say . I said so many time to myself if i can go without my dad i can go without him it’s not easy .
I’m currently going through this! Thanks for the pointers! I’ve been with my husband for 23 years and married for 13. He just doesn’t want me anymore. All we do is fight over the stupidest stuff. Neither one of us has left the house, so it’s really tough being in a house with someone who don’t want you. I’m afraid to be alone.
Ladies,I know your pain,that’s why I posted in Nov 2014. I went through the same thing with my ex-husband. He wanted me and another woman,and wanted me to be ok with it. I put up with that for 6 years, waiting for God to change his heart as He did mine, but he wanted none of God, only his selfish desires. But I tell you this, it was God and only God who helped me endure all of it. He was out in public with her and we live in a small community, totally humiliating. But God had me all the way. I set my face like flint toward God and He sustained and got me through it ALL. Was it hard? Yes, we had been together for 23 years, but married just shy of 20. So all I can say to you is to seek the Lord with all your heart, soul, mind and strength. Let Him be your husband. Remember, you are never alone, He is right beside you. He truly gives beauty for ashes. Joy will come if you choose to trust Him and Him alone.
Great article am already doing those that tells am doing it well glory be to God…
Oct. 31,2014, my husband of 26 years told me that he didn’t want to be married anymore. Said we had grown too far apart. He was involved in an emotional affair with a coworker and felt like he was in love. He was not happy with me and wanted out!! I was devastated. I cried. I basically went through several of the 5 stages of grief. It felt like he had died but I was still seeing him everyday. Our youngest child is in the 12th grade and he wants to wait until after graduation to leave. I have been a Christian since the age of 12, but I have really learned to trust in God while dealing with this broken marriage. We went to counseling & to a 12-week marriage seminar through church. He doesn’t want to do anything more. Doesn’t want any mention of the covenant that we made with God. I pray for him daily. I know that whatever happens, God has me. I use the 4 ways to find strength to carry on.
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