Giving birth is such a blessing, and can be a wonderful experience if you have the right support system around you, including the hospital you give birth at, your nursing staff, and your birthing team (OB/GYN, midwife, and/or doula). Although most of us aren’t well off enough to rent out a whole room like the Carters, there are other options like private birthing suites to make your experience as relaxing and memorable as possible. But do you truly get the treatment you deserve (or the treatment you don’t) based simply on your skin color?
Denene Millner, founder of My Brown Baby, discussed her experience of birthing while black on Huffington Post’s Black Voices. Millner revealed that despite paying extra for a private room, birthing suite, and other amenities, she had to ask for the things she paid for and was treated unbelievably rude by the staff. They drug tested her baby without her consent, did not give her proper instructions after birth, and acted surprised when the man who stood by her was her husband, and not just the baby’s father.
Despite the fact that I paid for the private room and meals, I was immediately put in a massive post-birth room with three other women and their newborns. I was moved only after I asked why I wasn’t in a private room””a question that elicited scowls and foot-dragging from the nurse until she bothered to check my paperwork to see that, indeed, I’d paid for a private room. It took three hours for my room to be changed.
Read the rest of the story at Black Voices.
What was your birthing experience? Do you feel like black families are treated unfairly compared to other races?
Lamar says
I’ve heard from several of my male friends that they were treated like unicorns at the hospital when their wives gave birth.
Rose's Daughter says
I’m a labor and delivery nurse. I work in a “urban” hospital. NONE of our patients are treated any different based on race, social status, etc. I myself delivered at a majority white suburban hospital. And yes, my husband was treated like a unicorn. Also, We were bombarded by the financial office on the second day of our stay about when we would be paying our 25% co-pay. You could almost SEE the shock on their faces when we pulled out our card and paid for it. And they were even more surprised when it went through!! SMH.
Briana Myricks says
Did you give birth to other children? If so, were you treated the same way? Did you go to a different hospital? If you didn’t, would you have?
Carissa S. says
A lot of nursing staff on ob/gyn units are judgmental (at least thats been my experience) and already come with judgments when they first look at your chart…im sorry you had that experience.
Guest says
When I had my son I noticed that I was treated differently from my roommate but not because of my color. She was an African American single mother (I was too, kind of, but my son’s father and my family were there a lot of the time with me). The nurses often came to get her baby and take the baby to the nursery for her so that she could sleep, they came to check on her very often, gave her breathing treatments, helped her bathe, etc. They never did any of those things for me so I think they just felt that I was probably ok because I had visitors and people with me. I was glad that they gave her the time and attention they did, it was a little surprising and heart warming. Although, there were a couple of nights I wished they’d taken my son so I could have slept, lol.
Samanthamonroe6 says
OMG! I am so glad that my experience was different. I am in Atlanta and Piedmont Hospital’s (yes I said their name) staff is amazing. We all had private rooms (I think that’s the standard there). The nurses were very attentive and made my husband and I feel very comfortable. I’m so sorry about you ladies that experienced differently at other places. It’s not right and I’m glad (again) I didn’t receive that type of treatment. I’m sorry if you ladies did.
Malkiann says
I am an African woman and when I went to have my daughter a nurse aide was unbelievably rude to me. She walked into my room in the middle of the night, switched on all the bright lights and started preparing the other bed in the room for a new patient. She didnt say anything to me about what she was doing waking me up in the middle of the night when I was just beginning to get some sleep after being up with my baby all day and half the night. When I asked what she was doing, she got all sarcastic and asked if I was aware that that was a hospital. Really? Am I aware that this is a hospital? I called her out on her rudeness and reported her immediately to her supervisor. I wasn’t going to let anyone treat me like that when I was paying to have my baby there. And the funny thing is, this was a black woman treating a fellow black woman like that! Maybe she didn’t like my African accent! Anyway, everyone I complained to (the nurse, my ob/gyn, the other doctors who came to check on me and her supervisor) was very apologetic and they ended up not bringing the new patient to my room.
Briana Myricks says
I’m so sorry you were treated so rudely! I can’t believe how ridiculous some people can be, and expect you to just take it. I’m glad you got the apologies you deserved.
Erica Bunker says
Wow! I have 3 kids and my first grandbaby. I have never felt mistreated and I’m QUITE particular in the service I receive ANYWHERE. Other than the normal “poking and prodding” that you receive while convalescing in a hospital, my treatment all three times was as good as it gets. My daughter just gave birth last month and the staff at UAB Women’s and Infants (in Birmingham, AL) was EXCELLENT! Her birthing suite was wonderful and so was her hospital room. I have no complaints. My MIL is a RN and she also commented on how wonderful the staff was — and she was looking for something to complain about. I will not buy into that “you get treated poorly because you’re Black”.
Now if she had said you get treated poorly based on your insurance, I can ride with her. I do believe “classism” exist moreso than racism these days.
Kerri says
Very sad, upsetting and unfortunate for the families that experienced ill treatment during such a special, sacred time.I had both of my babies @ Northside Hospital in Atlanta,GA. Both times with round the clock attention, extra amenities, lots of support, a private room, and enough space for my husband to be comfortable. Let me also mention that my Ob/GYN’s are from a great Black practice. I wouldn’t trust my babies to anyone else or the black pediatrician that took care of my babies after their birth. Its scary when professionals in the medical, educational, and judicial professions are biased. Anytime you don’t feel comfortable, speak up and get someone else. Its not worth the risk or stress.
mochazina says
Of course they are. Everyone will probably not get noticable differences in treatment on an individual level, but our statistics speak for themselves. Our disease and mortality rates tell us that somewhere, somehow we are getting lower quality treatment.
We should all look into using birth centers or having home births as well.
Serenity says
Your absolutely right….we should first consider a Birthing center or a home birth. And trust our bodies and be in tune!
Quaneshia Holden says
My birthing experience was great, I had a private birthing room, and all of the nurses and doctors were nice. They were so attentive that it almost got on my nerves because I was trying to rest lol. But my experience was great.
Gradschoolandbabydrool says
My experience was wonderful! I had the best, most caring nurses on the planet. One nurse in particular was so enamored by my husband and I, she came in early the next day just to see our little girl being born! (I labored for 24 hours.)
However, some of the nurses continually asked me “do you have help at home?” I would reply, “Yes, that big black man over there is my husband.” One nurse was very courteous and explained that they see a fair share of patients who do not have support at home after giving birth, so they like to make sure those patients have the resources they need post-partum. I am appreciative of the clarification. All patients were asked this, regardless of race.
I only had one complaint…my baby and I were taking a little stroll around the hospital when out of the blue, a nurse came over and said, “We need to take the baby. Her doctor is here to see her…” while proceeding to grab my baby. I immediately stopped her and ask that she not be so abrupt. I mentioned this incident to the nurse supervisor, who extended a sincere apology and made sure all of the nurses communicated clearly to patients when they needed to take babies back to the nursery, or for any other circumstance. This same supervisor also bought me a cup of coffee from Starbucks!! (Love her!)
Other than that, it was great. I was pampered and treated like a queen. Although some of the nurses threatened (teased) me and said they were going to take my baby home because “she’s so tiny and cute…and she’s the best baby in the nursery!” I loved those ladies!!!