“It’s the most wonderful time of the year!” rings the Christmas classic in malls. That’s the same song that goes off in my head when I log in to my social media accounts and see the abundance of engagement, wedding, and baby announcements and photos. If you’re single and childless, then yes, it’s maybe not so wonderful compared to everyone else.

If you don’t see yourself dropping to one knee or see a ring on your finger come Christmas, Kwanzaa or New Years, guess what – you’re going to be alright! It’s all about how you react to all the good news around you; have you been naughty or nice? There are a few ways to feel this time of year if you are currently single or dating…but nowhere near the altar:

Jolly: Praise the Lord! You find out that a friend, Facebook associate, family member, celebrity (like Kelly Rowland) has found the love of their life and is about to start a new chapter in their life in the new year and you are happy. This is the right attitude to have because it means that you are not stressed about your own timeline… or, when meeting someone special or getting married will happen for you.

If you are truly happy or jolly for someone’s life announcement (engagement, wedding, family increase) then you have no problem clicking the Like button or sharing a comment on their announcement. And trust, it will most likely be others too. This is a prime season outside of Valentine’s Day for engagements. This is also the time of year when people post photos of their families.

Share in their joy and be happy for them, trust the Lord that your day will come too. Send a prayer or two their way, as well, because with new chapters come new challenges. While the thought of their good news is in mind, intercede for their protection; remember the enemy and haters don’t like to see people doing something positive or productive!

Spoiled: You feel some kind of way when you see or hear these joyous announcements of others. You’re not all that mad about it, but it’s hard to be 100% happy for the couple or family. Why? Because somewhere on the inside you are a bit jealous, envious, competitive, and right now you feel like you’re losing. If you’re last in the race to the altar in your close group of friends, don’t get jealous of others; it will only stunt your own blessings from coming to fruition.

Family, it’s so tempting to feel jealous because they found love, are happy, and “living the dream” that hasn’t manifested for you yet. You want all those feelings and the attention, but are you really ready for a commitment like marriage at this point in your life? You’re like that spoiled kid on Christmas who’s mad they only got nine of the ten items on their wish list. Like that disappointed kid, you have to take a second and be appreciative of the life that you currently have and the blessings that came with it. Just because you’re not engaged or married around this time of year doesn’t mean that you can’t enjoy your holiday season.

Is a spouse, shiny rock, or baby more important than having the other things that God has given you up to this point? Let’s not be spoiled singles this year, pouting and not seeing the glories in being single, in not having children before our time. Enjoy this single season and thank God for keeping you and preparing you for becoming the husband or wife, father or mother that you desire to be.

Grinch: We all know about the Grinch who stole Christmas because he never thought he would have love, acceptance, or even the joy that came with spending time with loved ones on Christmas. The Grinch was mean and angry, but he was really sad on the inside. If you find yourself upset or sad that you’re single in the midst of all these Christmas announcements, remember that it’s a common feeling amongst all people but it’s also a trick of the enemy.

You deserve to be happy and in a fulfilling relationship, but again, is that the season you are meant to be in right now? Your time will come; it’s just not your time yet. Who wants to hear that around Christmas? Yeah I know, but when you admit to yourself and to God that you feel sad or angry that everything is changing for, seemingly, the better for everyone but you, you can take a step to feeling better. You can start preparing yourself for healing and growing as an individual.

If you have a hard time with these announcements on your social media, then maybe you need to fast from it for a couple of weeks to get your mind and spirit right. Get a good look at what’s in your heart and find out the reason why you feel so down when others are feeling up. Is your heart so many sizes too small that you won’t let God in to grow it?

Wherever you fall in these descriptions this year, be honest with yourself, take notes, and be there for those who have what’s still on your wish list.

BMWK – how do you find joy over Christmas, even when your life is not exactly where you want it to be?

Tatianah Green is a multimedia content creator with a passion for writing. In 2012 she launched her first blog, B.L.I.S.S. {Black Love & Inspiration for Saved Singles} to encourage the Black faith community to be the best in their personal relationships with God that will in turn create successful relationships and marriages. Tatianah wants to engage readers in conversations that discuss how our community approaches popular culture, dating, and relationships. Tatianah lives, works, and dates in Chicago. Connect with Tatianah on her blog, www.blissforsingles.com