I watch people and I ask questions. My family sometimes calls it nosy, but I proudly claim it’s curiosity. I am curious about why other people do what they do. I sometimes copy what I see successful people do, because I too want to be successful. I’m not just speaking of success in business, but in life in general, motherhood and being a wife. I emulate what I see has benefited others and add them to my own life. With my marriage, although I don’t come right out and ask other people what I should do, I listen intently when they share the successes that have happened in their marriage, and I apply them when necessary and beneficial. Believe me, we can all learn from one another and I am a lifelong learner, especially with the matters of the heart. Here are 10 valuable lessons I learned from watching other wives.

1. Cater to your spouse. Making sure I am clear on my husband’s desires by asking what they are, has been extremely helpful in my marriage.
2. Don’t be so quick to accept any and everyone’s input on your marriage. There is some very negative advice out there about marriage, and we must be careful in deciphering what’s good for us and what will damage our relationships.
3. Defend your spouse. No one should feel comfortable bad mouthing your spouse in front of you. We should be our spouse’s biggest supporter, always.
4. Know your partner, and act like you do. It’s important for me, not to put my husband in situations I know would make him uncomfortable. This comes as a result of truly knowing him, listening to his requests and paying attention to the signals.
5. Enjoy your spouse’s company. Whether it’s date night, intimacy or just watching TV together, time is one thing we can’t get back. It’s important that I show my husband I actually enjoy being in his company and spending time with him.
6. Make sacrifices for your spouse’s sake. Marriage and commitment are all about sacrifice. I say it often, only because it’s true, we have to make our spouse feel as though they are the most important person in our relationship.
7. Never say things to your spouse you don’t mean. You can’t take words back. It is a must that we are extremely careful in how we communicate. Disrespecting your spouse comes with consequences you may not be ready for.
8. Do things your spouse wants to do. Even when it’s the quirkiest, weirdest thing you’ve ever heard of, if it makes your partner happy, be willing to give it a try.
9. Don’t be a stick in the mud. Just because you’re married doesn’t mean you’re dead. Live in your marriage. Laugh, be playful and simply enjoy sharing your life with your spouse.
10. Seek God together. The strongest marriages I have ever seen all put God first. Praying and worshipping together is a key ingredient for healthy marriages and the most valuable lesson of all.

Healthy love is all around us, if we just paid attention. When you see a successful couple who is happy in love, don’t be afraid to ask them how they did it. When it comes to love, there are always valuable lessons to be learned.

BMWK, what’s a valuable lesson you’ve learned from other couples?