Tying the knot has been the symbol people use to describe getting married for as long as anyone can remember. There is even a popular site “The Knot” that people use for wedding planning. The knot is an interesting metaphor because knots hold things together, protect or keep something from falling and they are used to tie two things together.
My husband and I didn’t start to understand what this metaphor really meant until the year we decided to run for political office in 2011. After looking around our community, we wanted to know who was responsible for the vacant lots, the disrepair of the streets and the overall lack off economic development in our neighborhood. When we found that person was “the alderman” or the “city council member” we decided that we could do a better job and made the decision to run.
Now in most cases this would be no big deal, but in the case of Che & I we were newlyweds having only been married for one year prior to running. The day to day challenges and realities of life, working, raising children, assisting elderly family members, etc. can be pretty stressful. When a couple adds on other things like entrepreneurship, running for political office or even helping one’s spouse through a terminal illness like Cancer, it can test a marriage.
When things get hard in your marriage, tell your spouse that you “tied the knot” and if you tied a good knot the pressure of life will only make that knot tighter. If you or your partner get laid off, if your children start to behave like strangers, if you have to significantly change your lifestyle – don’t allow those things to loosen your knot. Don’t allow them to drive a wedge between you and your partner.
The key to ensuring that your knot stays tighter is to keep your love, friendship and commitment as a priority over everything. Communicate with kindness, patience and tenderness. When things get tough remind yourself that you “tied the knot” on the day you got married. You can even look at your wedding pictures. Grab your partners hand in the midst of a crisis and imagine that it is the knot, holding your commitment together.