Perfect marriages do not exist! Let us put this long lived myth that has been destroying so many marriages to rest. The myth that perfect marriages exist is nothing more than a lie that sets many marriages up for failure. These failures occur as a result of discord, disagreements, disharmony, worry, agitation, distress, frustration, fighting, and even hatred toward one another. As such, there is no peace.
Why does this happen? Because by believing in a false reality, one can never be open to live in the true reality within their marriage. Living and experiencing a true reality with your spouse allows each partner to be open enough to extend grace and mercy. This also means that each will be flexible and understanding enough to one another to experience unity. Unity provides harmony and harmony provides peace.
In life each season brings good and bad times. The same is true in our marriages. Marriage can be like oil and water at times if both spouses are not careful. However, it doesn’t have to be this way. You can have your cake and eat it too (with your spouse of course) if you strive for a few marital goals. The marital goals should consist of clear communication, respect, forgiveness, compromise, patience, trust, and if you want all of these you want to incorporate the number one tip below that will give you these and so much more!
Here is the number one tip my husband and I practice in our marriage that has proven successful in giving us an incredible sense of peace in our relationship. We believe it will do the same for you now, in 2018, and beyond!
PRAYER: The Secret to a Lasting and Peaceful Marriage
If you can relate to the following then let this tip be for you and yours.
One night, my husband Chris and I ended up in bed arguing followed by turning our backs on one another. We make an effort to pray together every night before going to sleep. Do we fall short sometimes, you bet! I say that to say again there is no such thing as perfection, so don’t try to be perfect and always practice grace and mercy where you and your marriage is concerned. This night…a sister was not trying to hear praying! I did not want to pray with him…real talk!
However, I could hear God talking to me and if you know like I know there is no tuning God out. He just gets louder!
He asked me, well more like told me “you know you need to pray with him and be the bigger person and initiate it.”
“I’m not feeling him tonight, God,” I replied.
“I understand and know you don’t,” He said. “But you know how the devil likes to come in to kill, steal, and destroy. What do you think he is attempting to do right now in this very moment in your marriage?” Within a few minutes, the Lord rolled me over, and I said, “Luv Bug can we pray please?” Chris and I both prayed, then I fell asleep in his arms. See how prayer fixed that!?
I’m willing to bet in your household or someone you knew coming up you heard the following: “A family that prays together stays together.” The Bible tells us that “with God all things are possible.” So with God in our marriage, is peace not possible? So who are we to question HIM?
Growing up, I can remember a hymn that says, “what a friend we have in Jesus, all our sins and grief to bear. What a privilege to carry everything to God in prayer. Oh what peace we often forfeit; oh what needless pain we bear; all because we do not carry everything to God in prayer.”
In 1 Samuel 1:9, the Bible helps us understand that, “by strength shall no man prevail.” Come together as a family and put your burdens upon the Lord and He will guide your path, answer your prayers, and bring you peace. Not any old peace either, but a peace that passes all understanding! Don’t take my word for it; go to the source: Philippians 4:7.
I thank God for that tradition of prayer He has helped us build. We give God all the glory in our marriage because I’m not kidding when I say that Chris and I would not be married had it not been for our prayer lives collectively and individually.
If I can encourage you with only one tip, it is this one! I would strongly suggest that all married couples begin adopting this tip into their marriages immediately in order to experience the ultimate peace of marriage.
Chris & I wish you a very Merry Christmas & Happy Holidays!
BMWK, do you believe in the power of prayer to bring peace to your marriage?