On July 11, my hubby and I celebrated our first year as husband and wife. A joyous celebration it was, complete with the most beautiful gift I have ever received, relishing the goodness that was the top layer of our wedding cake, watching our wedding video and reliving wedding day memories that will last forever.
I love my husband tremendously. Which is why I love Beyonce’s new “Best Thing I Never Had” song and video. Every now and then I think about the men I previously dated, some of whom I believed with every fiber of my being I’d end up spending my life with. Then I consider who that person has grown to be or what they’re doing with their lives, and I find myself grateful that the good Lord determined those individual relationships to be mere chapters in my life and not my entire book.
I have determined that God selected this man for me. I can’t front: everything hasn’t been peaches and cream one hundred percent of the time. There have been times that I felt like ripping my hair out and there have been times that I couldn’t have imagined being more than two feet away from him. He is my biggest fan and my biggest constructive critic. He is my rock and he keeps be grounded. And even on the occasions when I’m up to my head in frustrations with him, I couldn’t bear the thought of him not being in my life.
I couldn’t have selected a better father for my son. Just seeing the two of them interact makes my soul rejoice and I thank God for this life I live as the mother and wife to two of the best guys on the planet. If laughter is the best medicine, I’m in the best shape of my life with the two of them around. There’s never a dull moment.
Although we purchased anniversary presents for one another, we also purchased a joint anniversary gift in the form of our first home. We are gradually settling in and I feel our little family is complete. Just me and my babies doing this thing called life.
How was your first year of marriage? What was the biggest lesson you learned after spending a year as husband and wife?
Congratulations, Gwen! You, your husband and your son are in a wonderful position to perpetuate love, trust, and joy out into the universe!
Kris and I will have been married for 9 years this October, and it truly gets better with time. Our first year of marriage was NOT purple unicorns and happy dances at all! It entailed a ton of what-the-hell-is-this’s and aw-hell-naah’s as we learned each other’s nuances and got real familiar with our own egos and baggage. There were a few times that we seriously considered bailing out, but 9 years, 2 amazing daughters, and immeasurable love and respect later–we’re so glad we trusted our process enough to see it through.
Thx Akilah! Your story of how the 1st year of marriage wasn’t a walk in the park is a refreshing one. Something “they” rarely tell you when you’re thinking about getting married. I, too, am glad you and your hubby saw it through Congrats on almost a decade!
Thx Akilah! Your story of how the 1st year of marriage wasn’t a walk in the park is a refreshing one. Something “they” rarely tell you when you’re thinking about getting married. I, too, am glad you and your hubby saw it through Congrats on almost a decade!
Thx Akilah! Your story of how the 1st year of marriage wasn’t a walk in the park is a refreshing one. Something “they” rarely tell you when you’re thinking about getting married. I, too, am glad you and your hubby saw it through Congrats on almost a decade!
Congratulations, Gwen! You, your husband and your son are in a wonderful position to perpetuate love, trust, and joy out into the universe!
Kris and I will have been married for 9 years this October, and it truly gets better with time. Our first year of marriage was NOT purple unicorns and happy dances at all! It entailed a ton of what-the-hell-is-this’s and aw-hell-naah’s as we learned each other’s nuances and got real familiar with our own egos and baggage. There were a few times that we seriously considered bailing out, but 9 years, 2 amazing daughters, and immeasurable love and respect later–we’re so glad we trusted our process enough to see it through.
My first year of marriage, which we just celebrated our first anniversary on 7/24, was honestly the best year of my life. There were ups and downs, lefts and rights, but thru it all I had my wife & God! I can honestly say marrying my wife was the best decision I ever made!
Thank you for sharing your story 🙂
My first year of marriage, which we just celebrated our first anniversary on 7/24, was honestly the best year of my life. There were ups and downs, lefts and rights, but thru it all I had my wife & God! I can honestly say marrying my wife was the best decision I ever made!
Thank you for sharing your story 🙂
My first year of marriage, which we just celebrated our first anniversary on 7/24, was honestly the best year of my life. There were ups and downs, lefts and rights, but thru it all I had my wife & God! I can honestly say marrying my wife was the best decision I ever made!
Thank you for sharing your story 🙂
Yeah my 1st year of marriage was GOOD mostly me dealing with unemployment as a graphic designer. Learning to deal with each other insecurities and balancing friends and family. This year will be 3yrs and I am taking a week off as a wife to be wit my friends so I won’t feel smothered. I always do things for him but I can’t think of the last time I did something for me.
Yeah my 1st year of marriage was GOOD mostly me dealing with unemployment as a graphic designer. Learning to deal with each other insecurities and balancing friends and family. This year will be 3yrs and I am taking a week off as a wife to be wit my friends so I won’t feel smothered. I always do things for him but I can’t think of the last time I did something for me.
Yeah my 1st year of marriage was GOOD mostly me dealing with unemployment as a graphic designer. Learning to deal with each other insecurities and balancing friends and family. This year will be 3yrs and I am taking a week off as a wife to be wit my friends so I won’t feel smothered. I always do things for him but I can’t think of the last time I did something for me.
Congratulations on your first anniversary. May you have many more. You’ll have ups and downs every year, some more up and some more down, but your commitment to be married and to work things out will bring you through. I remember my first year as a time of excitement and uncertainty, filled with learning each other as husband and wife and learning to trust one another.
Congratulations on your first anniversary. May you have many more. You’ll have ups and downs every year, some more up and some more down, but your commitment to be married and to work things out will bring you through. I remember my first year as a time of excitement and uncertainty, filled with learning each other as husband and wife and learning to trust one another.
Congratulations on your first anniversary. May you have many more. You’ll have ups and downs every year, some more up and some more down, but your commitment to be married and to work things out will bring you through. I remember my first year as a time of excitement and uncertainty, filled with learning each other as husband and wife and learning to trust one another.
CONGRATULATIONS! My first year of marriage was honestly filled with more downs than ups. I believe if there were any assumptions I shouldn’t have made it was that being together for 7 years prior and having a couple kids in tow meant I understood what I was in for. The marriage dynamic is one that requires teamwork and constant communication and when that communication begins to go down abnormality sets in. So I say keep the lines WIDE open at all times.
CONGRATULATIONS! My first year of marriage was honestly filled with more downs than ups. I believe if there were any assumptions I shouldn’t have made it was that being together for 7 years prior and having a couple kids in tow meant I understood what I was in for. The marriage dynamic is one that requires teamwork and constant communication and when that communication begins to go down abnormality sets in. So I say keep the lines WIDE open at all times.
I really like your blog Mr. Payne. I visit often. You seem to come from a real place, if you will. And yes communication lines definitel need to be and stay WIDE open.
Thank you, kindly. I appreciate your words.
I really like your blog Mr. Payne. I visit often. You seem to come from a real place, if you will. And yes communication lines definitel need to be and stay WIDE open.
CONGRATULATIONS! My first year of marriage was honestly filled with more downs than ups. I believe if there were any assumptions I shouldn’t have made it was that being together for 7 years prior and having a couple kids in tow meant I understood what I was in for. The marriage dynamic is one that requires teamwork and constant communication and when that communication begins to go down abnormality sets in. So I say keep the lines WIDE open at all times.
I’m not going to ruin the awesome vibe this article gave me by talking about my first year of marriage. LOL What I will say is CONGRATULATIONS!!!! You two are an inspiration, and I definitely feel honored to have witnessed from a distance everything unfold for you.
Here’s to many many more years, and may they get sweeter and sweeter as time flows by. #celebrate
awww Thanks Harriet! You’re so sweet! 🙂
I’m not going to ruin the awesome vibe this article gave me by talking about my first year of marriage. LOL What I will say is CONGRATULATIONS!!!! You two are an inspiration, and I definitely feel honored to have witnessed from a distance everything unfold for you.
Here’s to many many more years, and may they get sweeter and sweeter as time flows by. #celebrate
I’m not going to ruin the awesome vibe this article gave me by talking about my first year of marriage. LOL What I will say is CONGRATULATIONS!!!! You two are an inspiration, and I definitely feel honored to have witnessed from a distance everything unfold for you.
Here’s to many many more years, and may they get sweeter and sweeter as time flows by. #celebrate
Congrats! My wife and I celebrated 1yr on the 17th. Not easy by any means. We relocated to California from Ohio last August. We’re still trying to fully adjust. I personally have had difficulty trying to balance marriage, kids, job, etc. No one said this thing called LIFE would be easy. You really have to focus and be intentional about you committment. That’s the biggest lesson I’ve learned.
Congrats! My wife and I celebrated 1yr on the 17th. Not easy by any means. We relocated to California from Ohio last August. We’re still trying to fully adjust. I personally have had difficulty trying to balance marriage, kids, job, etc. No one said this thing called LIFE would be easy. You really have to focus and be intentional about you committment. That’s the biggest lesson I’ve learned.
What part of OH are you in? I’m from Cleveland (but live closer to Detroit now)
Congrats! My wife and I celebrated 1yr on the 17th. Not easy by any means. We relocated to California from Ohio last August. We’re still trying to fully adjust. I personally have had difficulty trying to balance marriage, kids, job, etc. No one said this thing called LIFE would be easy. You really have to focus and be intentional about you committment. That’s the biggest lesson I’ve learned.
Congratulations! It’s only been 2 months for me but I’m looking forward to all the great things (and even not so great) that’s in store for our first year.
My husband and I dated from the age of 13 until the age of 23 when we got married. We have currently been married 18 years and it is wonderful, but the first year was not that great. We had to learn what it meant to be married and identify the roles and responsibilites that we were comfortable with in OUR marriage contract, not our parents, grandparents or friends.
We recommend reading Shades of Love: Portraits of Successful Marriages to gain some insight into what other successful couples have to say about making your marriage last forever.
http://www.shadesoflovebook.com
Submission is not the enemy of independence but the order of God in marriage
Congrats! The first year was great, because it was like a long honeymoon! lol
Congrats Gwen. It’s been almost 6 years for us and it just keeps getting better each year. Our first year was great (not perfect..but great.)
How timely! I just completed my 1st year as well, so congrats to us! 🙂
My first year was full of discoveries. The knight in shining armor doesn’t fart around me or chew with his mouth open, but he did have a surprising personality that I never knew existed! I love my hubby dearly, don’t get me wrong, but the Male PMS was a shocker! There I was, thinking that men were romantics at all times, after all, he was that way when we were dating! And I went from girlfriend to Momma without being asked to! I guess I felt the need to fulfill that role since I was eagerly trying our my new position as Mrs. Cleaver! I quickly saw that being momma only lead to power struggles and head aches.
But honestly, throughout all of our growing pains, we both realize that God has “Joined” us together for a reason, and that reason is to love, respect, and honor each other as we are doing now. We look forward to many fulfilling dinner dates, vacations, quiet moments, and possibly children in our bright future! –Matthew 19:6
Thank for sharing your journey! 🙂
Our first year(s) of marriage was horrible. However, as God says in Ecclesiastes 7:8, “The end of a matter is better than its beginning, and patience is better than pride.” I am so grateful that although my husband and I can both suffer pride, that we have learned to put God’s word into practice in our marriage and so far, it has gotten better over the years. We celebrated our 8th year this past Tuesday (7/26) and we are going to a Marriage Dynamics class in our local area to invest more in our marriage.
Thank you so much for sharing this article!
I’m getting married in 2 weeks and I must say that that is probably one of the best scriptural references when it comes to the mindset you need to have as you’re making that transition and adjustment in marriage. Thank you!
Congratulations to you. My husband and I are spending our first year of marriage apart, me in Afghanistand and him in Iraq. I can’t wait to see what’s in store for our second year when, God willing, we will finally be together. He’s so strong and I’m so honored to be his wife. Good luck to you and everyone else. Marriage is so sacred and even though we’re many miles apart I feel so close to him. Once again, congratulations!!