by Tara Pringle Jefferson
My husband and I are BFFs. When I get good news he’s the first one I call and when I get bad news his shoulder usually gets soaked with my tears.
I love that we’re close. Not just lovers. Not just parents. Not just husband and wife. But FRIENDS.
Sometimes our different ties to each other fluctuate. We’ll be in a phase where being parents seems to consume us. Then we’ll find balance and take the romantic side of our relationship to the next level.
But I’ve noticed when I’m really the happiest – when we’re in “friend” mode. When we just enjoy being in each other’s company. When we’re not stressed about bills or work.
But how do you nurture the “friend” aspect of your relationship when so many other roles fight to be #1?
1. Realize that if the “friend” role remains constant, it’s much easier to fulfill the other roles.
2. Speak pleasantly. How do you talk to your other friends? Do you notice your voice is much calmer and sweeter? Mimic that same tone when speaking to your spouse, even when you’re irritated.
3. Get away as often as you can. Sometimes it’s hard to be friends when the house is a mess or the bills are overdue and falling over from the neat little pile on the counter. Go for a walk around the block or at the park.
4. Tease each other.
5. Tell your kids that Daddy/Mommy is your best friend. Being accountable to your kids helps.
BMWK family, what other tips would you add to this list?
Tara Pringle Jefferson is a freelance writer and blogger living in Ohio with her husband and two children. Visit her blog, www.theyoungmommylife.com, to read more of her observations about life, motherhood and love.
Ronnie_BMWK says
I totally agree with Tara. I really enjoy the friend aspect of our marriage. It’s like being with your best friend all of the time. We have so much fun together!!
Dianne M Daniels says
Love this…my husband of 20+ years is indeed my friend – my best friend. I have shared so much with him, no one else could ever fill that space. I love that we are friends and that we just enjoy spending time together.
One of our favorite things to do is sit on the couch in front of a roaring fire, watching tv and just fall asleep in each other’s lap…entwined on the sofa, comfy as can be, and just content to be in each other’s presence…
Ad says
I think this is great. My husband and I are “re-building” our friendship. After 13 years of marriage somewhere we got off track and we are working on it. I’m glad we recognized it for what it was and are able to work it out.
Ayizemaat says
Great article Tara….Aiyana and keep our friendship at the forefront of our relationship and it definitely makes the other aspects of our relationship so much better
Gods_Man says
Staying friends is really important. To really see love grow and flourish in our marriages we have to let our spouse know that they can be free with us.
Dale says
Great article. My wife and I are friends in every sense of the word. We have lots of fun with each other. Couldn’t ask for a better partner.
Reggie Williams says
GREAT article. When I got married 10 years ago I wanted my boy to be my best friend. But I quickly found out that there is nobody that I rather hang out with than my friend. HANDS down – she is my BFF and I am her BFF.
http://www.ruleyourwife316.com
Goddessmarindy1 says
This is great advice to live by when it comes to relationships. ;0)
Charlene W says
I love this….definitely how I feel about my other half.
Anna says
Why do ppl not want to marry their BFF? It does make married life so much more easier. I love walking in the door (at home) and being able to tell my husband my day, be it good or bad, he is always there to listen and vice versa.
I will add, don’t take all things so serious, we really do have to pick our battles. Some things are really not worth your blood pressure to boil. LOL.