by Tiya Cunningham-Sumter
Through college and most of adulthood I was considered a matchmaker. I had a knack for knowing who would fit together perfectly. Lately, I have been using those same matchmaking skills on my husband. This requires an explanation, so here it is. I can’t pick my husband’s friends, but if I could, there are a few I would suggest. Some months back I heard the term “man date” on a sports radio show and it immediately caught my attention because I had been guilty of trying to plan several of them. A “man date” was described as an outing for a couple of guys set up by their wives or girlfriends. Or it could also be done in the presence of the wives/girlfriends. The ladies all sit together and leave the guys in a separate area to get to know one another.
Yes, I have introduced my guy to the boyfriends/husbands of my friends in the hopes they would hit it off and make us one big happy friend-family. I can admit to being in cahoots with my girlfriends in getting our guys to hang out. My thinking was that the guys could possibly develop a great friendship if they just took the time to get to know one another. Now this is not to say anything negative about my husband’s current friends because they are great. It’s just that these other guys would normally have so much in common with my husband. I wanted him to be open to adding new friends. Most men might look at this as me trying to take control. Of course he can pick his own friends; I just offered recommendations, though unsuccessfully.
What I learned in the process is that if the guys are interested in hanging out they are more than capable of planning something on their own, if they so choose. So, for now I am hanging up my matchmaking hat…. for now.
Men, have your wives/girlfriends ever tried to set you up on a “man date”? Ladies, if you have tried it before what was your approach? Is this a good idea or is it just meddling and controlling?
By Tiya Cunningham-Sumter, a Certified Life & Relationship Coach, Founder of Life Editing, creator of The Black Wives’ Club and an Administrator of Still Dating My Spouse.
My wife always wants me to be friends with her friends’ husbands. It rarely works out. I’m capable of picking my own friends.
.-= Fred´s last blog ..A Tradition of Marriage =-.
Ha! Ha! Sounds like something MOST (if not all) women have engaged in at one time or another.
I would venture to bet (If I were a betting man…which I am not – I hate losing money. But I digress) that the majority of women who have attempted to set up a “Man Date” for their mates have been usuccessful?
I could be wrong (which I am sure the ladies here will glady co-sign to in following comments), but could it be that since it is so hard for men to make friends, and even more difficult for men to lose and/or change their current friend circle, most men place a little more value in “friendship” that most women?
*puts on flame-retardant button down shirt*
.-= Brotha Tech´s last blog ..Twitter Business, I mean, Biz Card =-.
Thanks men for your comments, but why is it so hard for men to make friends?
When a guy makes a friend, it is expected to be solid. Unlike some women, we don’t just make friends on a whim nor do we intentionally create frenemies (friends that are potential enemies). For us, creating friends is something like the inclusion of a new person into a wolfpack. We men must ensure that the newbie is worthy and that he molds well with that the pack is doing.
As Brotha Tech stated, it is difficult for guys to lose friends, so to minimize the likelyhood of do so, we go to great lengths to ensure that the pack is solid.
…and creating Mandates is ill advised.
Well well. Tiya, this is an interesting one. I have not set my husband up on a man date per se. We have tried – on very few occasions – to go out with other couples…and my hope is that my husband will click with one of these guys…but that rarely happens. My husband is not from the area so my hope is that he finds some good guys that he can hang out with guys that I can trust. He’s just not interested. So, because I know him, and the rage (ok maybe not rage) but the deep disdain he would have for me setting him up on a man date, I wouldn’t touch it with a 10-foot pole. As easy as it is for women to make friends – or associates, business partners, affiliates – I don’t think it would bode well if our husbands or boyfriends set us up on girl dates either.
Signed,
Waiting for him to naturally make some friends…hey it’s only been 5 years….he’ll make one one day besides his barber…right???
I think for the most part, men are SERIOUS creatures of habit. If you ask me how I gained the few friends I currently have, I honestly couldn’t tell you. But one thing I can tell you is that I know them, I am used to them, I am comfortable with them. So as a result “Why try to fix what isn’t broken?”. My current crew provides all that I need when it comes to comradery, so unless they all simultaneously disappear from the face of the earth (read: get married, j/k…I think), there is really no need to accept new applications for a new crew.
.-= Brotha Tech´s last blog ..Twitter Business, I mean, Biz Card =-.
Avery, you know have me questioning whether I make friends too easily :). When I would start a new job, my husband would often say something to the effect of “now remember not everyone has to be a friend” I guess he feels like I make friends everywhere I go. I don’t know that I would classify that as “on a whim” I am a friendly person. I understand that everyone can’t be a close friend, but I think it’s okay to meet people for lunch or dinner or just hang out.
@TER, I guess your story rings true to what the other guys have said, that men just don’t make friends that easy. It sounds like your hubby may be okay with what he has.
@Brotha Tech, thanks for breaking it down for me. I wasn’t think that it had to be a whole new crew, I guess I was thinking about someone to hang out with in addition to the regular crew. Women can have different groups of friends, is that not the case for men?
Yes! I am guilty of setting my husband up on man dates but surprisingly, I have been successful. My husband is very laid back and he gets along with everyone. He doesn’t mind making new friends. Some of the dates I have set him up on have been with friends he already had anyway. My reasoning behind it was so that my husband could get out of the house and have a good time. He is not a planner so I planned a few trips for him and his friends or brother and he loves it!
@Tiya,
My only concern with you setting me up on “man dates” (if I were your husband) would be that per your entry, you only want me to hang out with these dudes for your own (dare I say selfish? No, I am not gonna say it) reasons.
You really aren’t concerned with type of guys I hang out with because they pose some sort of problem that you think I should address (by getting new friends). You aren’t concerned that my friends are coming in between our “quality time” (if you were, you wouldn’t be trying to get me MORE dudes to hang out with).
If I were the “always analyzing” type of guy (which I am) I would speculate that you are putting your concerns ahead of mine. Which would force me to rebel by not really trying to get to know these guys just to spite you.
Now if you think it would be cool if we could hang out with your friends and their husbands from time to time and maybe turn into “one big friend-family”…JUST SAY SO!
Don’t be trynna plot!
(I know my grammar for that last sentence isn’t up to snuff)
.-= Brotha Tech´s last blog ..Twitter Business, I mean, Biz Card =-.
@ Brotha Tech, you can say selfish, I can admit that 🙂
The type of guys were (what appear to be to me) quality guys, family guys. Guys I feel have something in common with my husband like being married, having children, working hard, (and might I add having wonderful better halves). But I have learned a lot from this post and your comments.
@ Brotha Tech
So honestly, if your wife was straight up with you and told you that she wanted you to get to know some other brothers, would you consider it? If a woman tries to delicately tread upon the male ego by doing creating these kinds of opportunities in a roundabout kind of way, to you that’s the problem, NOT the actual “man date?”
Just curious.
@ TER and the other women on the blog: You said something which intrigued me so I just had to take a deeper analytical look into it. You mentioned that, “As easy as it is for women to make friends – or associates, business partners, affiliates” and I was wondering how is that so and is that really so? I mean I work in a corporate environment with a good plenty of successful women BUT if you were to ask some of them about their inner circle then they would share that majority of their friends are males or they kind of roll alone because they don’t trust females. So I was just wondering if maybe I am missing something BUT I overhear more than less women speak about how they dont easily make friends with other females because of the TRUST issue with them. Just looking for some insight. I personally think that men bond a lot easier than women just because there are sooo many avenues and things that we have in common from Sports that we currently play to other extracurricular activities such as Sports that we used to play back in high school and college .. LOL .. BUT all jokes aside are there any other women who feel as though its easier for women to make friends than it is for men?
@ Harriet: I think that for me and maybe for some other men the issue and or problem is in the phrasing of “Man Date”. In my mind and in my eyes when I hear the word date I think of an activity involving individuals of the opposite sex. So to say that a group of men are going out on a “Man Date” doesn’t quite sit well within my mind or my spirit. Call it trivial or whatever but I don’t date men so I would not consider entertaining anything called a “Man Date”. So if my lady wanted me to get out and hang out with some other brothers then she knows that in order for that to happen it will have to be worded in a way that I will receive it. I think that that’s the concern that a lot of men have with that in my opinion. I will hang out with the fellas or kick it with the fellas BUT I won’t go out on a “Man Date” with the fellas. It just doesn’t sound right.
I do encourage my husband to go to events that our church has specifically for men, and my hope is always that he will develop new friendships with other men, particulary those that are dedicated to God and family. I think more than that, gentle encouragement to partcipate, is considered meddling and could seem controlling. I think male friendships are different than female friendships in many ways, including quantity over quality and the amount of time devoted to this relationships. Just because women may value a large number of relationships and a high quantity of time spent with other women, doesn’t mean that men are wired the same way. I know my husband has a handful of close male friends and that number has stayed fairly consistent for as long as I’ve known him. I also know that these friends can go weeks, even months, without speaking or seeing one another and pick up where they left off with no problem. They all seem happy with this, so who am I to try to change him or how he establishes and maintains his friendships.
@ The Gentleman, in my relationship, I definitely make friends easier than my husband. Which isn’t to say that all women make friends easier than men. But I’m gathering from the other posts that men are just not quick to make friends. It seems like my husband has a guard up when it comes to making new friends whereas I am more open, now don’t get me wrong, not everyone gets to be a close friend where I’m sharing secrets, but they can become a friend that I enjoy to be around and hang out with from time to time. I can relate to some of what the women in your office have said. There are some definite issues amongst women, of course there are women that have issues with other women before they even get to know them, but that is a whole new article 🙂
@Tiya – I really hope you didn’t learn anything from my comments, lol! But really, (This applies to @Harriett too), I would probably still say no even if you decided to come clean and state your true intentions…but that doesn’t mean you try to trick me into going.
*side note* and since when have any of you women ever accepted no for an answer anyway! Just keep asking, and eventually, just like ALL the previous times, we cave in anyway
@Jennifer – co-signature!
.-= Brotha Tech´s last blog ..Twitter Business, I mean, Biz Card =-.
Your Honor, I am guilty as charged!! My husband led a very sheltered life and does not know what healthy male relationships are or even loving parental relationships. I had been trying for months to set my husband up with a very good married male friend of mine who also has two children and one day I was surprised by a very wonderful text message, that my hubby had actually called him up to play PS3 games. I was ecstatic! I came home to find the two of them laughing over video games, beer, and take out! Mission accomplished. Now hopefully the lines of communication are open.
Alright, I’m new to this, so here we go…
Confession #1) I’m not married
Confession #2) I’ve seldom dated
Having said that, I guess my comment is more of a question, rather than a statement:
Shouldn’t some friendships remain separate from “date-ships” (if I may introduce the term)? Instead of thinking along the lines of “Men are from mars/women are from Venus” when it comes to how people form friendships… I wonder if it’s simpler than that… Maybe it helps to have friends that can remain objective. What happens to the “big happy friend-family” when a couple isn’t getting along? There could be times when there’s just way too much involvement, with one person too many… (NOT talking adultery, but Three’s a crowd, let alone four to six! You know?)…Just a thought.
Setting up our men on “Man Dates” sounds great, if the motive behind it is honest and If our intent is good in doing so. When we do set them up, our hopes is that the bonds will happen organically and not because they feel like “my wife wants me to do this”. When I moved to Illinois a few years ago my husband was really quick to introduce me to a several women that he knew through various organizations hoping that I would bond really quickly with these women and have a ton of great new friendships. While his motive was good, the relationships did not happen organically. It was almost sort of—-well, Fake! However, I ended up meeting a whole new group of women on my own, mostly through my new job–about 10 of them, and have been blessed by their friendships for the past 5 years….because it didn’t feel like I was pushed into it. The friendships evolved over time! Now, I do believe that women do make connections sometimes much quicker than men. Soooooo, in situations where we see our men can use a little extra push in the bonding department, a good suggestion is getting men to possibly bond and make new friendships is to also encourage them to join organizations. For example, the 100 Black Men organization is a great opportunity for African American men to make connections, lots of networking and more importantly MENTORING our young black boys! They can make new friends and help the community at the same time.
I agree completely with Avery. As a women who has more male friends then female, I am very particular who I add into my “wolf pack”. With me being so selective with my own friends, I would never try to pick my husband’s friends. I think going out once in a while with my friends and there dates is cool. He doesn’t have to be friends with them.
@ The Gentleman – I read your post yesterday and couldn’t wait to respond…so hard to do on your mobile device…so here it is. The point I was making is that women have the ability to make friends easier than men. Adding “…or associates, business partners, affiliates†to that sentence was purposeful. I don’t think we consider every woman we come in contact with our friends. We have the ability to have superficial relationships (not to sound negative) – which are relationships that serve a purpose – relationships that we nurture for whatever reasons. Men don’t. If you are going to be in a man’s circle – this dude has to ride or die for your boy – or they see no purpose in having and sustaining that relationship. So, in fact, I agree with the women in your office – I too have a relatively small number of “friends” – I can count them on 2 hands…these are my ride or die girls – i mean – they would give me the shirt off their back, the food off their plate, the gravy off their white potatoes…ok you get it. These are my friends. Most women – I don’t trust and have had many more successful friendships with men. But if you think about my circle – I probably have 100’s of women in my circle – whose relationships I cultivate on an ongoing basis. If you think about the intent of the original post – getting guys into environments where they can meet other guys to hang out with. The man date serves that function for men. I do have to respectfully disagree that men bond easier – I think women bond much easier – evidenced by our much wider and more varied network. I would agree that a man-to-man bond may be stronger – but certainly not easier to establish. I think this is similar to what Jennifer and Tiya expressed and that I believe to be true. I think Chocolate mom’s experience is a man date success story. Sorry M Montgomery – but men ARE from mars and women ARE from venus…newsflash – the longer I am married, the more I believe that to be true. If a couple isn’t getting along – they should not come to the party. Like…Richard T. Jones in Why did I get married too…why did he even show up? I digress – I cannot wait until tomorrow to see the movie – ok i’m back. Finally, M – I think couples things are a blast. The last time I had one – 4 couples hung out on my back patio, we ate, drank, talked trash, politics, and relationships – and it was a blast….not a crowd. Just good, clean, grown-up fun.
@Chocolate Mom, that really worked out great.
Well said ladies!
I don’t understand the point of a “man date.” Why do you feel the need to meddle in your husband’s friendships. If a guy wants some more friends, he will find some. If you have a hard working family man, who is responsible, spends time with his kids, and still makes it a priority to treat his woman right, then he does not have time to add in new friends.
Tiya, you are really creating problems for yourself. Be happy that when you and your girlfriends want to do a couples thing that your men go along and don’t complain. Why should we be best friends with your friends’ partners. This is just an underhanded way of saying that your man’s friends aren’t good enough.
Bryan,
Let me start by saying, I really do like my husband’s friends, they are truly great guys. My wanting him to meet/hang out with the other guys would be in addition to what he already has, not to replace them. See I have different circles of girlfreinds, I was thinking my husband could too. I am very grateful that my husband does enjoy the couples’ outings, he’s even set up some of those on his own. I guess the thinking behind the “man dates” came from my meeting some really great guys (through my friends), the guys I had in mind, were also on his level, raising families, working and plus were the husbands of my really close friends. I just thought with those things in common, they would hit it off. Which they have actually hit it off, they just don’t do anything outside of the couples outings. Which I am cool with that, I know he can pick his own friends. Just so you know Bryan, I have hung up my match-making hat. 🙂
Your blog posting has been FARked. Check out the discussion on FARK.com:
https://www.fark.com/cgi/comments.pl?IDLink=5168264
Here’s the issue: When you say you don’t want to change his current friend base, it doesn’t sound like you mean it. If you were really totally satisfied with the friends he currently has, you probably wouldn’t have any reason to look for different ones to “round them out”. What if you end up being unsatisfied with his current friends after he meets new ones which are so much more better and appropriate for him to you? Even if you don’t mean to cause any disturbance between them, you might well unconsciously prefer his “new” friends over the old ones.
No matter how honest your intentions are, this could be seen in a very negative light for these reasons.
I could see this going south fast. You need to consider one very important thing: What if you achieve this “big happy family” thing and it backfires?
You’ve managed to get all of your friends boys/husbands hanging out and being friends together. Great. What, then, happens if one goes to his new found bros for advice about his relationship and it is determined he should break up with a girl. This drives a rift straight down your girlfriends and the guys. They’re going to defend the guy’s choice, and your girlfriends will want to go to the rescue of the girl.
Where will you stand? Defend the girl and lose your boyfriend or side with the guys and lose your friends? The guys aren’t going to necessarily pick you up as the girl of the group, because you’re already one of their girlfriends.
Suddenly, and quite simply you’re out in the cold.
Think of how easily people break up in this day and age. This could actually happen very quickly. And it’s quite probable.
Apply the same rule for play dates…err…” man dates”… as you would for dating in general: Date outside the group! Find a colleague your man might like and set them up. But remember, that’s the same as dating that guy. If the friendship between your man and the colleague goes south, that looks bad on you and could screw things up at work.
You’re best off avoiding this all together.
My ex-wife used to do this all the time, specifically the her friend’s husbands. Once in a while she would bring a male co-worker to a party I would be hosting and try to make him fit in my circle, usually with little success. But this would always drive me crazy. You ask why it is hard for men to make friends. I ask why is it important that a female feels the needs to “match” her husband with other men?
If you have that motherly instinct to want to ensure your Man’s overall being, just buy him a case of beer and give him a couple of nights per week to hang out with his real boys at the bar…
~Duke
because what you call friends are what we call aquaintances. you don’t just make a new friend. a friendship is something that is grown and cultivated over years and years of time. you share real meaningly experiences based in reality, not on your version of reality.
ugh.
I’d personally prefer to have two good friends than a bunch of people I sort of know and but label friends. I think men are more likely to think that way than women.
This need to have heaps of pals is also why women tend to suck in very competitive situations like sports.
ONMG… this thread is comedy gold. Awesome. The sexism is just dripping right from the blogger through all the comments. ‘Men don’t make friends’, ‘women do make friends’, and on and on. At the risk of flat-lining a hilarious read, and yes, it is side splitting… I’ve been having trouble not giggling here in the lab, let me help you fine folks out a little bit with some science.
1. Friendship is not gender biased. There is not now, nor has there ever been, any medical or psychological evidence that men and women are less or more capable of friendship because of their biological sex.
2. The same is true of any other emotion, desire, or habit. All visible differences are CULTURAL, and that means that the behavior is ACQUIRED. We learn to discriminate from our family and peers.
3. Relationships are based on one, and only one thing: Communication. People will often insist that religion, money, security, and many other things create an intimate relationship. This is totally false. Communication has been proved repeatedly in tests by Johnson and Johnson, Dr. Joyce Brothers, and the Kinsey institute, to be the foundation and backbone of anything that can be called a relationship.
So, if you’re plotting for your mate, be sure you have their explicit consent. Don’t assume that they just can’t do it. Maybe they don’t want to. In most marriages, men and women do things for their mates because they perceive that the mate is demanding it or expects it as a condition of the relationship.
The question was asked, “How would you feel if your husband tried to set you up with female friends?” I can’t speak for anyone else, but I’ve been begging my husband to do this for some time. I’m a stay-at-home mom and I homeschool, so I don’t get a lot of opportunity to meet other women. The ones that I do meet are all “too busy” to get together or spend time with somebody new–they’ve got their own family matters and are usually juggling a full-time job and a bunch of other friends. So I’ve been living in this town almost five years and I don’t have a single “girlfriend” that I can hang out with or just chat with from time to time. I wish I had someone to set me up with prospective girl friends. 🙁
Wow. I couldn’t put up with that kinda stuff. I’ve seen it happen tons of times, a woman doesn’t want you to hang out with people that are already your friends, and tries to find you new ones. Men are perfectly capable of making friends themselves. Women should stop trying to shape there boyfriends and husbands. You may as well just take him in to get neutered if you are gonna try to control every aspect of his life including who he forms relationships with.
While I understand the whole situation. It feels wrong and I really believe it is. You say that his friends are ok so why not leave it at that? You say these people have more in common but I doubt that. I’d say they probably have more in common with what you are trying to get him to be. You come up with excuses which are quaint and they seem innocent enough but in the end you are still trying to change your companion to suit you, which you are not supposed to do. Your companion will sense this and because it’s innocent will not be able to say anything negatively, but a level of resentfulness will likely build as he feels his world slipping way into what you are trying to create. I couldn’t imagine doing this to any one I loved. Many women are far too comfortable treating their men as if they were incompetent. This is perpetuated by the typical father persona on t.v. and men putting up with it to appease their companions. Please stop emasculating your men. It’s not good for anybody in the long run. Thank You.
For a while, my wife tried repeatedly to set me up to go fishing with other men she thought I would get along with. I reluctantly went along on some of these because it turned out I was the last person she got involved (the other wife, children, cousins, etc.)
Finally, I made it clear that one of the main reason I went fishing was to get away from people. I told her thank you for thinking of me and now, stop.
The women I know tend to dislike being alone more than men. So, the assumption is that men dislike it, too. That assumption is wrong.
If my wife tried to pick my guild for me, I would cancel our cable! See how she likes not having her stories!
.-= Urinal Gum´s last blog ..Five Things in the New Health Reform Bill that THEY Dont Want You to Know About! =-.
Yeah, getting set up on man dates seems worse than being set up my friends on blind dates.
Way worse actually because if a blind date doesnt work out and your friend who set you up asks why you can just say, “I am just not attracted to herâ€. With man-dates it seems like your only option is to hang out a few times until the person who set you up has forgotten completely about it.
But I still dont understand why you would want to treat your man as a child and try to help/force him do things that you deem as important. If he wants new friends and is having trouble, he will probably let you know this. If not, then he doesnt care enough about it and you shouldnt either. Its not like having a small group of friends will give you cancer or anything.
I have to agree with demopoly. So long as you’ve communicated to your husband your wants and needs, and he’s down with it, you can meddle. But if you’re conspiring and being all under-handed, well, we all know how that works out.
As for your assumption that your husband has “lots of things in common” with this guy, and thus they should be friends…as a guy I can say that I’ve never tried to make friends with a guy b/c I had a “lot of things in common” with him. Honestly, most of my friends have very little in common with me. Do we play the same sports? Nah. Do we like the same things? Nah. Do we have the same hobbies? Nah. But we hang out all the time, b/c it just feels right to hang out with them.
The things that we have in common aren’t things that you can really measure objectively. My close friends get weirded out by the same things I do, and our vibe feeds on one another to make us get more and more goofy and rowdy the longer we hang out, and we can laugh at the same kinds of jokes, and we can talk seriously without offending each other. I’ve met lots of guys who play the same computer games I do, work out at the same gym I do, like the same girls that I like, and have the same job as me…and I get NOTHING from hanging out with them. I’ll tolerate ’em if my g/f approached me and told me that she wants me to hang out with the guy, but we’ll never be good friends.
Your matchmaking probably worked because WOMEN tend to like to have all of those similarities, like matching ducks in a row. So, you’ve made half of the match, and over time you’ll probably get lucky and one of the guys who is a good match for the girl eventually finds that this girl is a good match for him. But the things that guys want out of a relationship and the things girls want out of a relationship are frequently different, which makes it difficult for women to “pick out” potential friends for their man.
Thank you guys! I am really loving this feedback. Men, know how to tell it like it is. I really didn’t see this as being that big of a deal, but it is really good for me to get the feedback of other men.
If your freinds boyfreinds or husbands are interested in hanging out with me, they can meet me at the bar to watch the game.
Something important to keep in mind is if your husband is, like me, more of an introverted person. Even if he spends a lot of time alone and only has a few friends, maybe that’s exactly how he likes it.
I’ve read some of the posts (admittedly about only half) but I noticed a pattern. The women who say they are setting their guys up say the things the two guys have in common is married, children, family man etc. I don’t know about the rest of you guys but if I were married I don’t believe the thing I looked for in a friend was married, children etc. I would want a friend that was into the same things I was into when I was away from my family, wife, children etc. Just a thought.
@Holly- Sorry to hear about your situation. Have you tried Mocha Moms or Jack and Jill?
This isn’t really a mystery. It comes off to me as an attempt to control my life by picking approved friends. No thanks. It can be handled correctly but almost never is. Also, I don’t want to be friends with my brother- in -law just because we have the same equipment, stop being control freaks ladies!
Wow…I think this topic has set a record with men respondents! I LOVE it (and for the record, will never, ever, neverevereverneverever try to set my husband up on a “man date” after reading this). LOL
Awesome job, Tiya!
.-= Harriet´s last blog ..Take Off The Mask! =-.
Let me bring this down to the most basic Man-Task
COMBAT
No, I’m not some fascist, right-wingnut TeaBagger but a typical American who spent two years fighting in the jungles of Viet-Nam. I came out of that hell with no more than five “best friends”, people I would unquestionably lay my life down for. Going in, I had no idea who my friends would be or what their qualifications were. I can tell you that I probably wouldn’t even have shared a beer with three of them until our lives depended on one another. When you are in combat nothing is planned and your true character comes out. Ideally, you cover your buddy & he covers you. Some freeze and leave you exposed, possibly dead. Others, whom you’ve never thought two sentences about save your life and you save theirs. So don’t try to set me up on dates, I have enough trouble with my “pickups”.
Awesome Post!!
Thanks Anonymous! Oh Harriet, I am done, done, done with man dates, lol!