By Anduza 

Milestone birthdays are a good time for reflection. It’s important to take stock of where you are in life and see what changes you need to make in order to live a happier more fulfilled life. I’m a month away from the BIG 3-0, so I have been reflecting on some life lessons that my 20s have taught me that I think will help me make the next decade of my life even more successful.

Regardless of your age, these are important lessons to learn, so take note of them and add more lessons from your own life’s experiences.

1. Know yourself. Take time to understand yourself – strengths, weaknesses. passions, fears, values, goals etc. Understand how those things affect your relationships.
2. Accept yourself. Stop pretending to be more or less than you are. Make peace with who you are. If you are shy, talkative, smart, poor – accept it and learn to make the most of what you are and what you have.
3. You’re enough. As Colbie Cailat’s song ‘Try’ says, ’You don’t have to try so hard, you don’t have to bend until you break.’ You’re good enough as you are.
4. Be kind to yourself. Stop the negative self-talk.
5. Treat yourself well. Exercise, get some rest and compliment yourself every now and then.
6. Celebrate small victories. Celebrate the journey as much as the destination.
7. Be grateful. Count your blessings – often we have more to be thankful for than we ever realize.
8. Dream big. Where there is no vision, the people perish. You need a strategic plan to guide your life, career and spending habits.
9. Have faith. Believe that things are happening for you, not to you.
10. Feed your dreams. Surround yourself with people, things and books that make you better.
11. Take action. Dreaming is one thing; doing is another. When you have made your plan – put it into action.
12. Follow your instincts. Your inner voice is an unerring GPS navigator. Get better at following its commands.
13. Always keep an open mind. Be flexible and open to new things, ideas and experiences.
14. Look beyond what you see. Some Lion King wisdom here, but it’s true. Things are seldom what they seem; give yourself time to gather the information you need to make smart decisions. Research that home purchase; take time to know that person you are dating. A lot of trouble can be avoided by making informed decisions right from the outset.
15. Avoid analysis paralysis. Do your research, but also learn to seize the moment. Don’t over analyze everything to the point that you end up not doing anything. It’s easier to beg for forgiveness than to ask for permission. Sometimes you just have to take a chance.
16. It’s okay to be alone. You’ll never achieve your dreams if you always have to have company. Sometimes you have to break away from the crowd to pursue what matters to you.
17. You need others. Every David needs their Jonathan in order to reach their peak potential. Develop strong relationships to get the support you need to navigate life’s challenges.
18. What will be will be. What is for you cannot be held from you. You can’t say the right thing to the wrong person and you can’t say the wrong thing to the right person. If the job or relationship is meant to be yours – it will be yours.
19. You cannot buy love. You cannot make someone love you if they don’t. Accept it and find people who appreciate you.
20. Stay in your track. Everyone’s journey is unique. Things happen for us at different times and in different seasons in life. Don’t compare yourself or compete with anyone. Accept your circumstances and live within your means.
21. Seasons change. Nothing lasts forever. Learn to anticipate changes and stay ready so that you don’t have to get ready when seasons change. Hone your job skills while you search for a job, do all the things you want to do before you have your child – its all coming. Stay ready.
22. It’s all about perspective. It’s not what you go through in life that determines your destiny; it’s how you look at it. When you cannot change what you are looking at, change the way you are looking at it.
23. There’s no crown without a cross. Everyone has a battle to fight. Challenges are a part of life. Do not get despondent when things go wrong, find some effective problem solving strategies and learn to move forward in the face of adversity.
24. Be reflective. Take time to digest what is going on in and around you, to avoid repeating the same mistakes over and over.
25. Be slow to react. A little time out can save your relationships, job, business etc.
26. Learn to accept criticism. Everyone is not a hater. Sometimes you need to hear the difficult truth.
27. Take responsibility. Own your mistakes and learn from them.
28. Never forget where you come from. Stay grounded. Success is sweeter when shared with long time friends and family.
29. Live one day at a time. Learn how to enjoy and savor each moment.
30. Get a sense of humor. You need to learn to laugh at yourself. It’s really not that serious guys – take it easy!!

As the old adage goes, ‘it’s not the years in your life that count, it’s the life in your years.’ Use lessons from past experiences to help you make your future better, happier and more productive.

BMWK, can you think of any life lessons to add to this list?

Anduza is an idealist. A learner. An explorer. Business maven in the making. Future life coach. Lover of all things fashionable.