“You need to get on it; you’re going to be 30 soon.” If you’re not age thirty yet or have reached that decade of your life already, you’ve probably heard something like that statement before. For some reason, age 30 seems to be the start and the end for many things in life for men and women. From a woman’s perspective, if you’re not married by 30 you have even more pressure from society, family and even yourself to get married due to biological reasons.
I’m sure that my single brothers feel the same way but not as harshly as women do. They seem to get questions about being established or if they are ready to settle down. Men have a big part in the home as being providers and depending on what that means to them, they may not be ready by age 30.
But my question is, why are we seemingly afraid or anxious to enter this decade of our lives as if it’s a deadline that we can’t make? I often battle with the fear of the unknown, but I don’t want that fear to hinder my blessings. What I love about God is that He trains us up to rely on Him and His timing, especially in those uncertain moments in life.
There are several reminders in the Bible that talk about things happening at an “appointed time.” Appointed means something chosen, prearranged or scheduled. God had a plan for His Son Jesus in ministry that did not start until He was 30. With 33 being the age Jesus was crucified, His appointed time came and He fulfilled His divine assignment on earth. Without His willingness to walk in the Father’s sovereignty, we wouldn’t be able to do the same today.
“Therefore judge nothing before the appointed time; wait until the Lord comes.” 1 Corinthians 4:5a NIV
If marriage didn’t or doesn’t happen for you by age 30, keep waiting on and trust the Lord. If you find yourself getting anxious about approaching a certain age like 30, 35, 40, and beyond, know that it’s normal to have some thoughts that make you wonder what will happen next. I encourage you to let go of the number and hold on to the gift giver of all things good. Look up articles or talk with older people who you trust on why 30s are good years, so that you won’t walk into them with dread or frustration because something you’re expecting hasn’t happened in your life yet.
As you get older, you get wiser and it’s a beautiful gift to have in making decisions in your love life. So let’s truly see your twenties as finding yourself or finishing up the goals of your young adulthood and allow your thirties and beyond to be correctly applied knowledge a.k.a. wisdom. Wisdom will defuse the fear out of what ifs that you will get or even ask yourself. Wisdom does this by reminding you of God’s promises for your life and what He’s done for you in the past. Wisdom will tell you to run to the Lord for refreshing, protection and guidance when things seem challenging or when you get attacked in your mind.
Look forward to winning, losing and learning so much more about yourself. It would be cool to do that with a partner or spouse at your side, but if not, it’s not the end of the world. I look forward to my 30th birthday next year and walking in divine purpose. The world needs people who are wise and not distracted by fear or anxiety over singleness to make those little changes that cause ripple effects in the environment around us. Will you be in that number? Wait for the Lord’s appointed time for what you’re expecting Him to do in your life. It will be more than what you’d ever imagine within the limits of your own timeline.
BMWK, Are you going into your 30s with great expectations?