SO before you get married, ask the hard questions, think not just about the exciting, strumming of love, but about the life you wish to build together.

If you’re not on the same page when you go to build (especially if you build on sand…you know, the surface stuff rather than the proven strongholds of the rock) the end product of that house, will either bring misery to all or stop you in the process because you’ve both decided to go your separate ways.

SO STOP GETTING MARRIED JUST BECAUSE YOU’RE IN LOVE. Wood and matches alone does not a fire place be….where would all the smoke go? Where would you put the wood? On your wooden floors? Lighting a match there? Really? You must be off your head.

And a house, no matter how beautiful or how costly it may be, if the foundation is not solid or up to code, that baby will fall like a ton of bricks when life happens. And life will happen. That is why there are building codes…..the hard questions you ask before the engagement and most def before you’re saying I do, unless you want ‘I don’t’ catching up with you.

So…..

Have you asked the hard questions?

Can your love withstand the everyday wear and tear of life?

Are you prepared to put effort into rekindling the fire? And not just that one area everyone seems to think is the only fixer upper. You know the one. Involving rose petals and baby oil. Or is that just me? Yup. Oh well.

And last…..

What are you building (what are your goals, what’s the direction…) and what on (sand, rock, money…)?

Figure this out before and stop giving our generation false impressions about marriage and commitment. As my mentor (Shanel Cooper-Sykes) would say, “commitment is doing the thing that you said you were going to do, long after the feeling that you said it in has passed”.

So instead of running to the divorce court as soon as anything happens you don’t like, ‘we just fell out of love’, pull up your sleeves, wash your hands and put some work in. Bring out the boxing gloves if you have to. Mind you, not to fight each other but that ugly devil wanting to come in and kill and steal and destroy your love. Let him know you’re made of stronger stuff and serve a higher God…. amen.

www.foxyliciouslexi.blogspot.co.uk

Alexia Wood, Founder & CEO of bLAIRwOOD International INC, is a Guyanese born Author, Speaker and Poet residing in London, England. She is passionate about using her creative abilities to “empower success-driven young men and women with a desire to build extraordinary lives, to step into their greatness and live their best lives”. For more on Alexia visit her Facebook  and her site Lexi’s Smooches.