Your marriage flow is uniquely yours. No one can copy it. You can’t imitate someone else’s. Your marriage flow is stamped with the fingerprint of you and your mate. It is as unique as you are.
You won’t find this definition in Webster’s dictionary. However, here is what it means to me.
Marriage flow is the rhythm of your relationship. The heartbeat, the pulse that keeps you moving together in sync with one another.
It is the zone that allows you to be present for each other and for your family. It is the skill set within your marriage that allows you to function and fit together in a consistent, seamless manner.
You are unified and moving together, whether the waters of life are drifting, raging, or dripping. High tide, low tide, no tide – you are still seamlessly together with nothing coming between you.
Every married couple has a flow. Here are 3 straight forward keys to help you get into your marriage flow.
Communicate often. Do more than just talk.
Watch each other – understand one another’s body language and facial expressions. Hear what your mate is saying even when they are silent. Listen with ears to understand rather than to defend or hold one’s position.
Know your mate’s strengths and weaknesses
Know these areas not to use them against your mate or try to change them. Use this knowledge to keep your marriage strong. If you know your mate is weak in a certain area, fill in the gap and vice versa. Where your mate is strong you can relax a little more allowing your strengths and weaknesses to complement each other.
Make moves together. This means coming into agreement. It means give and take. It means knowing when and how hard to push or pull in a certain direction so not to disrupt the flow. It also means knowing when to stop and just be still.
Related: A husband shares 10 reasons he is still married, and not one of them starts with “just because”
Once you hit the sweet spot in your marriage flow, you will do whatever it takes to protect it. Daily living will be easier when you are in sync with one another. Decisions will be made quicker and with less tension because you have developed the ability to understand one another on a more selfless level that seeks the good of the family.
Find your marriage flow. It may take some time but don’t give up. It may even feel like things are getting worse before they get better. Hang in there for each other. Put in the time and effort to create something beautiful, a happy marriage. Find your flow.
BMWK, Have you found your flow?