Common concerns in some marriages are that women desire better communication and husbands desire more intimacy. Would you agree? Each of these areas are crucial to a healthy marriage, so both partners have to be mindful when it comes to making them happen more frequently.
Husbands typically want their wives to desire them a little more and actually want to be intimate with them more often, but that’s not always easy. Wives typically want their husbands to open up more frequently, but again, that isn’t always easy for some husbands.
Wives, when it comes to better communication, there are a few things we sometimes overlook. Here are the five things we must remember:
He doesn’t have to communicate like you
We can sometimes get confused on what communication should look like in the relationship. The reality is, your husband doesn’t necessarily have to express himself in the exact same way you do. He is his own person, with his own ideas. How he shares his ideas with you is ultimately up to him. If the goal is more communication, it shouldn’t matter how it happens.
Effective communication is more than just speaking
We have to also remember there’s listening. Having effective communication means we’re listening twice as much as we’re speaking. Listen to your husband’s ideas and his thoughts without push back.
Create a space where your husband feels safe expressing himself
Some men are hesitant to share how they’re feeling for fear of being misunderstood or even judged. Make your marriage a judgement-free zone, where both partners’ thoughts and feelings matter equally.
Conversations in your marriage should be dialogues not monologues
Wives, we have to make sure we aren’t talking at our husbands. He has to also feel included. When he doesn’t, believe me, he’s going to check out and tune you out.
Assess your own communication style
Is it effective? We can think we are amazing communicators, but if there’s still confusion or our messages aren’t clear, we may not be as great as we think. It’s important that we monitor our body language, choose our words carefully and check for understanding when we’re done. It takes two to have effective communication.
Effective communication begins with us. We have to be willing to take ownership of our style of communication and keep in mind all of the things listed above. Remember, it starts with you.
BMWK, what are some mistakes you think wives make when it comes to communicating?