by Tara Pringle Jefferson
I’ve written previously about how much my dad means to me and I always write about how my husband is also the World’s Greatest Dad and how he can handle things just fine.
But so often when we look at the parenthood, it focuses so much on Mom. Just look at the magazine industry: Parents, Parenting, American Baby. None of that says “Dads not welcome” but if Dad is mentioned it’s usually in an article giving Moms advice on how to “deal” with him and his ways.
Eh, forget all that. I’m not ashamed to say that I think my husband is the better parent. He’s more patient and more fun. He tickles the kids until they’re all out of breath and he comes home with treats “just because.”
He knows when we’re low on diapers and more miraclously appear before I can even fix my mouth to ask him to run to the store.
He drops our kids off at daycare and picks them up to bring them home. He does our daughter’s hair and he’s our son’s barber. He hooks us up when we go to Sam’s Club and he is able get them out of the bathtub and into pajamas in record time.
Dads deserve more respect.
Moms, get out of your own way sometime and let the man work. He might not do everything the way you would, but sometimes, if you give him enough space, you’ll see that his way is actually better. (Don’t shoot the messenger!)
Our kids deserve to see their Dads as equal partners, to see what a strong, capable man looks like. Give them their due!
Fellas, own your role as a dad. Be confident.
BMWK family, do you think dads get enough love?
Tara Pringle Jefferson is a freelance writer and blogger living in Ohio with her husband and two children. Visit her blog, www.theyoungmommylife.com, to read more of her observations about life, motherhood and love.
Thank you for this article!
Lots of dads probably back away from being as involved as they should be. And its probably due in part to the very magazines and stereotypes that you cite. I think more pressure (and I mean positive pressure) should be put on dads to perform better. Encourage them to get involved. Your hobby is unfortunately the exception rather than the rule but that could very well change. No kids yet for me but I intend to be just like your hobby.
I love the fact that there are some awesome dads out there. I actually know a few of them and hope that my kids learn from their example and not the one of their actual father.
Peace, Love and Chocolate
Tiffany
Thank you. I love being a Father. And there are many times that I feel like I am invisible in a world that seems consumed with talking about how much damage careless men (who I have no power over) are doing to themseleves and to woman and children.
I love being a dad almost as much as I love being a husband… Honestly I wouldn’t go back and change being a dad for anything in the world, it’s the most important job any man could ever have!
Hey Sun, I agree with u there r some awesome ones, and there are some not so awesome ones. My children’s mother and my future wife would never bad mouth any of her children’s fathers not even to say “don’t b like him” or “don’t follow his example”. I think that will only backfire and does no one any good. I remember every time my mom would say something disparaging about my dad my most primal or base feeling was “ok whatever, he’s the only dad I have.” I felt this and made a personal distinction between my dad and the other adequate father figures that were available and inside I knew I didn’t want 2 follow his example but having anyone else say anything like that (even mom) hurt me and lowered (however slightly) my esteem for my mom.
One reason why I am so in love with my wife is because she tells me everyday that I am an amazing father. Her validation is all I ever need. Although I have to admit that my attempts at doing baby girl have been less than successful. I yield the queen (my wife) on that from.
I meant front not from at the end.
Tara, I am my son’s barber. He gets a nice line up and smooth taper in the back every two weeks. But I am still struggling with my daughters hair. She has a big, beautiful, wavy afro. I think the reason I struggle with her hair is because I try to be too delicate. You need some serious dexterity to pull the hair correctly and create a nice looking ponytail. I’m still working on it. At least she no longer cries when I comb her hair.
Anyway, thanks for the shoutout to us dads. I’m not saying we don’t get enough love. But I’ll always accept more!
My husband does our son’s hair with ease and is really, really good at doing my daughter’s hair. It takes a lot of patience because at 3, her hair is down to her butt and you have to go really slow so she doesn’t cry the whole time. I can’t take it so he took it over. No LL Cool J Coke commercial here. LOL
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CXhEtgO59EQ
In some areas, my husband is the better parent. For example, playing with our son making sure baby supplies are stocked. In some areas, I am the better parent; bath and nap time. I wouldn’t have any other man be the father of my child. He is wonderful.
Beautiful!
As a dad, myself, I can agree. Thanks for posting.
Thank God some one cares about us black fathers/husbands, I’ve been doing this for 22 yrs. It’s been very hard indeed but reading this article is some justification, there should be more articles like this maybe more men will step-up.
Absolutley spot on. Well I have nothing more to add to this. You Know how I feel on the issue.
That commercial is me! Fortunately, mine’s only 9 months old, so I have some time to get it right before she starts to notice how bad I am.
Yes, we could use a little more love. 🙂
Yes, I too believe dads need some love.