“Be willing to share all of who you are. So many of us want a partner, but we’re not willing to show all of us. That’s why we have a weave, we’re wearing Spanx and everything is ‘fine.’ If you’re not willing to let your partner see your cellulite or know your biggest fears, then you aren’t really ready to share yourself…”–Iyanla Vanzant, ESSENCE

In an age when table toppling and drink throwing have almost become a standard on television, life coach and television phenom Iyanla Vanzant entertains through empowerment and enlightens with love on her hit series, Iyanla, Fix My Life, on OWN. The Brooklyn-born former single mother of three on welfare, who once had dreams of becoming a nurse, has now become a spiritual adviser, counselor and healer to women and men around the world with her soothing balm of life lessons and no-nonsense knowledge. Here, she shares with ESSENCE readers her ten secrets to finding real and lasting happiness—and tells us why she will always have a reason to smile. The February issue of ESSENCE hits stands on 1/11. For more on this issue, visit  ESSENCE.com.