Don’t we all wish there was an “easy” button for marriage? The moment something goes awry, we yank it out, press it, and voila! Problem solved. But, there is no such thing. Marriage is perhaps the most difficult relationship to navigate. It has the potential to yield the most rewards, yet cause the most pain…all in the same day.
Regardless of how difficult it is, people aren’t staying away from it. Financially, weddings drop 300 billion sweet ones into the global market every year. So, the idea of happily ever after is selling. However, after the wedding, the problems begin. And frankly, many couples don’t know how to deal.
Whether it’s poor communication, financial challenges, crazy in-laws, or infidelity, many marriages are plagued with the kinds of problems that begin with stupid simple mistakes. Issues that were swept under the rug when dating are now major grievances that need to be addressed. Thoughts that were once kept in check are now given free reign. Attitudes that were kept at arms length have permission to run amok.
So, what are some of these stupid simple mistakes and how can you keep them from destroying your marriage? We’ve compiled a list of 27 of the biggest ones and, in no particular order, have listed them below. Just remember, they’re called stupid simple for a reason.
- Remember to say please.
- Don’t forget to say thank you.
- Open the door for your wife.
- When your spouse speaks, you listen.
- Put down the toilet seat.
- A home cooked meal would be nice.
- Have a conversation over dinner.
- Put down the phone.
- Pray for your spouse.
- Say “I’m sorry.”
- Have sex as often as possible.
- Don’t cheat on your spouse.
- Pick up your clothes off of the floor.
- Keep having fun.
- Ask your spouse about their day.
- Say “I love you,” a lot.
- Remember their birthday.
- Let them know you believe in them.
- Don’t hide your spending.
- Tell them good morning.
- Call if you’re running late.
- A gift, just because, is sweet.
- Take a nice vacation or two.
- Remember and celebrate your anniversary.
- Check in at least once throughout the day.
- Don’t be a rogue parent.
- Talk “to” each other not “at” each other.
See what I mean? Stupid simple, right? Sadly, many of these very easy ideas often get neglected. And, in fact, many of these concerns are often downgraded to “pet peeves.” One may not be a problem. But string a few of them together and then leave them unchecked. Before you know it, your marriage will begin to spiral downward. Sometimes, when talking about the demise of their relationship, you might hear someone say, “Well, it wasn’t just one thing…” The “things” are beside the point. Overall, they just didn’t feel loved and taken care of.
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Many of these pitfalls are easily preventable because they are so easy to control. Regrettably, there is one culprit that usually stands in the way of a harmonious relationship. Both husband and wife can get caught up in their pride. Once that happens, really simple behaviors get caught in the crossfire and no one wants to give in. Pride must be kept at bay if these simple concepts are to take root and help your relationship flourish.
There are no easy buttons to fix broken marriages, but their are easy approaches to complex relationship issues. Whether the “issues” fall under the category of communication, faith, parenting, finances, fidelity or anything else, there are certain simple actions that should never be sidelined. They may seem stupid simple, but they work.
BMWK, what other really simple tips have helped your marriage succeed?